You know what’s worse than WhatsApp groups with members who send type ‘what’s up’ as ‘xup’? Family Whatsapp groups. You think your mum and dad sending you fake news BCs about poisonous apples stresses you out. Imagine getting a dozen of those BCs and more from different aunts, uncles, and cousins every single day. If you have a typical Nigerian family, then we can better that these are the members of your family Whatsapp group.
The cousin that always has something good going on in his life. If they are not promoting him at work, they are giving him scholarship for his Phd.
It’s not as if you are a hater o, you are happy for her. But she’s the reason your parents have been waking you up with does Cousin Tola have two heads texts at 3 am.
The Uncle that is in the overseas and makes sure nobody on the group chat forgets.
He’s always sending pictures in winter coat and replying messages with ‘innit’ and ‘ya man’.
Your spiritual Aunty that’s always sending prayer BCs and videos of people who went to hell and came back.
There’s no day you don’t wake up to messages telling you to ‘repent for the kingdom of God is at hand’.
There’s the Aunty that’s always asking for you as if you are owing her money.
Everyday everyday where is Sikemi, does she want you to be marking attendance in the morning?
The Aunty that lives in the abroad and can send 20 100mb videos in one day.
Please please data is cost here, act accordingly.
The cousin who keeps leaving the group chat by ‘mistake’ and the Uncle who keeps adding him back.
Where do you think you are going?
That sweet Aunty who always remembers every single member’s birthdays, anniversaries etc.
Who needs Facebook when you have her?
The cousin who is younger than you and is always saying nonsense on the group just because he’s in the overseas.
He’s the one that told your Aunty to please stop sending BCs. You don’t have respect abi?
The Uncle who is always upset and only comes to the group chat to report other family members.
No day goes by without someone in the group offending him. The last time it was because they didn’t reply the BC he sent.
The joker that’s always posting dry jokes that no one laughs at.
When no one replies he’ll wait a couple of days and sending the joke again.
The Aunty that always has something to advertise, every new month she has a new business venture to advertise.
No Aunty I’m not interested in this your business that sounds like MMM but is supposedly not MMM.
The one who is always policing everyones DPs.
You’ll change DP and wake up to a new message – Tola is only irresponsible people that wear this hat you are wearing in your dp.
Then there’s you who never contributes anything except it’s someone’s birthday.
We are sure you’ve even muted the group for one year.
At the end of the day, you can’t help but have a hate-love relationship with your family group chat. Because as annoying as it gets, nothing feels better than being able to easily connect with the whole family.
If you haven’t seen the video, find it below, but yes, Femi Fani-Kayode (FFK) really showed the darkest side to him when a Journalist asked him if his recent visit to Cross River and other PDP states were being sponsored, or “bankrolled”. The thing is, there’s too many things that can be taken away from […]
Are there women who do not find the process of putting a meal together day-after-day enjoyable? Yes, there are, and I spoke with 8 Nigerian women on why this rings true for them.
Hair lice are tiny, wingless insects that live in the hair of humans. They feed on tiny amounts of blood they get from the scalp. They spread easily from comb to comb. It is especially rampant among kids. It’s not easy to get rid of hair lice but here are a few tips that have […]
Last week, we created a viral quiz that tested your knowledge on the capitals of all 54 African countries and y’all did pretty great. Now, we want to see how well you know the flags of those same countries. Give it a shot:
Are you straight, gay, bisexual, pansexual or asexual? Well, we are willing to bet that this quiz knows. Just pick a few of your favourite things and we’ll reveal your sexual orientation. Give it a shot:
Running for over a decade, Who Wants To Be A Millionaire remains one of the most beloved shows in Nigerian history, with many of us fantasizing about appearing on it and winning the grand prize of ₦10 million. Well, we gathered 15 real questions from the show to test how you would have done. Go […]
Are you an ajebutter or not? Well, if you’ve gone through life blissfully unaware of its harshness, then you probably are. Now, we want to know just how high you rank on that ajebutter scale, using your food preferences as a (very accurate) measure. Take to find out:
Everyone has something to say about what kind of person they are. But how well do we truthfully evaluate these things? Not that much, I can assure you. The average person is always lying to themselves to make sure they look good. But you know what and who doesn’t lie? Zikoko quizzes that’s what. Take […]
Are you a single pringle, stuck in a complicated situationship or happily married to the love of your life? This quiz is here to guess your current relationship status, and as you know, Zikoko quizzes are incredibly accurate (don’t quote us). So, give a shot:
Nigeria’s leading dishwashing liquid, Morning Fresh, has unveiled Tolani Tayo-Osikoya, a successful Chef, Food Blogger and Owner of Diary of a Kitchen Lover, as its new brand ambassador. Prior to the unveil, Tolani had been sharing the inspiring story of her journey on her social media platforms, reassuring Nigerians that dreams are valid even in […]
When it comes to games night ideas you can play with friends, it is best to consider the people you’ll be inviting so you can choose games that each person will enjoy. Not every time truth or dare, or never have I ever. Here are 8 game night ideas you can play with your friends. […]
Almost every guy has received that worried call from their girl, saying those words that make your stomach turn to water: “My period is late.” Immediately, you will just become weak and start feeling a ton of emotions. Here are some of the emotions you feel when your girl says her period is late. 1. […]
The University authorities released a statement addressing the rise of Covid-19 cases in UNILAG on Tuesday after this tweet was made. Huh ??? Covid outbreak in Unilag ??? https://t.co/LbH5Xv3nM7 – Jahmal (@JahmalUsen) July 12. 2021 The statement reads, Read more here. School activities were going on as normal, even after several Covid-19 positive students were […]
What do you do before you breakup with someone? Well, you should try out any of these seven things. 1) Eat A hungry man is an angry man. So sometimes the reason you want to break up with your partner is because you’ve not had some good food in a while. Before you type that […]
“OMG, I love Zikoko.” We hate to break it to you, but only the true lovers of Zikoko can score 10 out of 10 on this quiz. We’ll definitely catch you here if you’ve been trying to scope us all the while. Oya take the quiz. Psst! Did you know you can contribute as low […]
Everyone is secretly the product of an old Nollywood couple combination. Take this quiz to find out which old Nollywood couple combination you secretly are.
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.
Z! Stacks
Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
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