You know what’s worse than WhatsApp groups with members who send type ‘what’s up’ as ‘xup’? Family Whatsapp groups. You think your mum and dad sending you fake news BCs about poisonous apples stresses you out. Imagine getting a dozen of those BCs and more from different aunts, uncles, and cousins every single day. If you have a typical Nigerian family, then we can better that these are the members of your family Whatsapp group.
The cousin that always has something good going on in his life. If they are not promoting him at work, they are giving him scholarship for his Phd.
It’s not as if you are a hater o, you are happy for her. But she’s the reason your parents have been waking you up with does Cousin Tola have two heads texts at 3 am.
The Uncle that is in the overseas and makes sure nobody on the group chat forgets.
He’s always sending pictures in winter coat and replying messages with ‘innit’ and ‘ya man’.
Your spiritual Aunty that’s always sending prayer BCs and videos of people who went to hell and came back.
There’s no day you don’t wake up to messages telling you to ‘repent for the kingdom of God is at hand’.
There’s the Aunty that’s always asking for you as if you are owing her money.
Everyday everyday where is Sikemi, does she want you to be marking attendance in the morning?
The Aunty that lives in the abroad and can send 20 100mb videos in one day.
Please please data is cost here, act accordingly.
The cousin who keeps leaving the group chat by ‘mistake’ and the Uncle who keeps adding him back.
Where do you think you are going?
That sweet Aunty who always remembers every single member’s birthdays, anniversaries etc.
Who needs Facebook when you have her?
The cousin who is younger than you and is always saying nonsense on the group just because he’s in the overseas.
He’s the one that told your Aunty to please stop sending BCs. You don’t have respect abi?
The Uncle who is always upset and only comes to the group chat to report other family members.
No day goes by without someone in the group offending him. The last time it was because they didn’t reply the BC he sent.
The joker that’s always posting dry jokes that no one laughs at.
When no one replies he’ll wait a couple of days and sending the joke again.
The Aunty that always has something to advertise, every new month she has a new business venture to advertise.
No Aunty I’m not interested in this your business that sounds like MMM but is supposedly not MMM.
The one who is always policing everyones DPs.
You’ll change DP and wake up to a new message – Tola is only irresponsible people that wear this hat you are wearing in your dp.
Then there’s you who never contributes anything except it’s someone’s birthday.
We are sure you’ve even muted the group for one year.
At the end of the day, you can’t help but have a hate-love relationship with your family group chat. Because as annoying as it gets, nothing feels better than being able to easily connect with the whole family.
Being the last child in a family comes with its perks and frustrations. And it also comes with a lot of condescending statements from people who try to define the life of the last child even though they have no idea how it is. Here are some of the things every last born in the […]
From the ones who eat the weirdest food combinations, to the ones who don’t even know they’ pregnant. We’ve mentioned nine types of pregnant women you’re most likely to come across in this life. Which ones have you met ?
Chioma* and Blessing* have been friends for seven years. They met in university and remained by each other’s side long after. However, in 2020, Blessing became obsessed with leaving the country. Here’s their story:
In this episode of #ZikokoMyBro, @OJOBAMIJI and @Tomiwa__A talk about making their 9 year friendship work despite being opposites, using bro code to handle girl trouble and why their friendship is similar to Batman and The Joker’s relationship.
At some point in life, we all learnt that someone can be very intelligent and still lack common sense. That’s the difference between being book smart and being street smart. If you’re not sure where on the spectrum you fall, well, that’s what this quiz is here to tell you. Take it:
Are you straight, gay, bisexual, pansexual or asexual? Well, we are willing to bet that this quiz knows. Just pick a few of your favourite things and we’ll reveal your sexual orientation. Give it a shot:
We are going to be attempting to guess when you’ll marry based on your favourite Nigerian foods. What does your fave swallow have to do with when you’ll tie the knot? Please, don’t ask complicated questions. This quiz is rigorous and accurate (don’t quote us), so just take it already. QUIZ: Why Do You Have […]
Twitter is buzzing right now, bringing a new conversation to the concept of cool vs not-so-cool, especially in relationships. If you’ve been thinking about how much of a red flag you are, why don’t you let this quiz help you decide once and for all?
Are you an ajebutter or not? Well, if you’ve gone through life blissfully unaware of its harshness, then you probably are. Now, we want to know just how high you rank on that ajebutter scale, using your food preferences as a (very accurate) measure. Take to find out:
Nigerian bachelors have only three meal options: noodles, rice and stew, and bread. It’s time to eat something else, please we beg. Try some of the meals we’ve mentioned.
Money comes and goes. If you already have it, you probably know what’s eating all your money. But if you don’t, here’s a heads up on the things you’ll suddenly start liking once you have money.
Amazon Prime Video has named Insight Publicis, an agency based out of Nigeria as its creative agency of record as it prepares to launch in Africa’s biggest economy in Q3 2022.
Offers opportunity for young changemakers from Nigeria, Kenya and South Africa to join the Global Citizen Fellowship Program for a year-long, full-Time, paid placement International advocacy organisation Global Citizen has today announced that application for the 2022/23 Global Citizen Fellowship Program powered by BeyGOOD is now open until 29th April 2022. Fifteen young African changemakers: […]
Triller, the AI-powered, open garden technology platform for creators, has joined #BreakTheBias, the global campaign in honor of International Women’s Day (#IWD2022) on Tuesday, 8th March. All Triller platforms will feature stories from 30 incredible women in the music and entertainment industry who are working to end gender bias, along with a specially curated #BreakTheBias […]
In view of the humanitarian crisis in Ukraine, MTN has announced it will be offering free international calls and SMS to all existing prepaid and postpaid customers, effective immediately. This offer is aimed at supporting customers to stay in touch with their loved ones while eliminating associated International Direct Dialing (IDD) costs due to high […]
ASUS has released its new Zenbook 14 Flip OLED (UP5401EA) and Vivobook Pro series (N7600/N7400). Pre-orders are available now. The Zenbook 14 Flip OLED (UP5401EA) is a slim, light and ultra-versatile convertible design equipped with a 4K OLED HDR NanoEdge touchscreen, having a 16:10 aspect ratio to give you a bigger visual workspace. The Asus […]
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.
Z! Stacks
Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
With podcasts all the rage now, we’d like to see how you create yours. And yes, we can totally tell what your toxic trait is from your preferred options.
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