In case you didn’t know, immediately someone becomes a Nigerian parent, they get dragged to a secret training facility where they learn to stress their children in different interesting ways.

Here are 15 of the most common:

1. Where they learnt the real use of their children:

2. Where they learnt to not trust their children:

3. Where they learnt to send mixed signals:

4. Where they learnt how to always win arguments:

5. Where they learnt to be selectively broke:

6. Where they learnt how to be paranoid:

7. Where they learnt the real reason for working out:

8. Where they learnt to tell this lie:

9. Where they learnt that gadgets are the enemy:

10. Where they learnt how to pronounce these words:

11. Where they learnt to be selectively generous:

12. Where they learnt to plan for the future:

13. Where they learnt to guilt trip you:

14. Where they learnt about demonic possession:

15. Where they learnt to hate rest: