10 Things Every Woman With An Office Job Can Relate To

July 25, 2019

Being a woman in most Nigerian offices is a peculiar experience. Actually, being a woman in Nigeria is a peculiar experience. When you get out of university and get into the workforce, you get flooded with tips and tricks to help you navigate your 9 to 5. But no one tells you what to do when despite your first degree and two masters degrees, a subordinate asks you to make tea because you are the only woman in the room. If that and these ten other things have happened to you in a Nigerian office, you should sign up and join our support group coming really soon.

I’m calm

Ever gotten a condescending ‘calm down’ or ‘it’s okay’ when trying to make a point about something you are passionate about? Yeah, me too sis.

Yeah, that’s exactly what I said…

Imagine this. You are in a meeting, you’ve written down your points about a topic and eloquently delivered them to the room. You’ve barely finished talking when you hear a distinct male voice from the back of the room say ‘What she’s trying to say is…’ and then he goes on to say everything you just said in almost the exact same words. But compared to when you spoke, everyone is suddenly nodding in agreement.

Getting a healthy dose of mansplaining in 9 out of 10 conversations

You could be talking about how periods and sanitary products, and one guy will chip in to explain how they ‘really’ work to you – you, who has been having periods for at least 60% of your life now.

The world stops when you are not smiling

Maybe you are having a bad day, or cramps are killing you, or you are just not in the mood to fix your work smile on your face. You’ll probably get 8 ‘why are you not smiling?’ and 6 ‘who annoyed you?’ before your lunch break.

You are the unofficial food prefect

Raise a hand if you’ve ever found yourself in this situation. A birthday cake was ordered for a coworker, the little happy birthday jingle has been sung and it’s now time to share the cake. You are the only woman in the room. All of a sudden, everyone’s gaze turns to you as they wait expectantly for you to take charge. One or two men who are bold enough to say it go right ahead and say – ‘So Sikemi, shey you’ll help us share the cake?’

You’ve mastered the art of the awkward smile

Every day, as you get ready for work you get ready to make use of your awkward smile for every inappropriate comment you get from a superior or coworker you are not ready to get into an argument with.

Getting pitched your own ideas

Ever gotten a suggestion from a coworker that sounded a little familiar? That’s because you brought it up in a meeting weeks ago. You only just remembered it because no one acknowledged it when you brought it up.

Saying sorry 502 times an hour

You punctuate the beginning and end of every single sentence with a sorry because you don’t want to come across as bitchy. ‘I’m sorry but could you please help me do this thing that is actually your job, thank you so much’.

Still being discreet about your period like you are 13 years old

Because even though it’s 2019 and women have been having periods since time immemorial, grown men still cringe at the sight of pads and tampons still in their packs. I’ve always wondered if they’d pass out at the sight of bloody ones.

And talking about periods

Having to grit your teeth and work through the worst cramps every month. Because if you took a sick day off for every time you got cramps, you’d get a query from HR in two months tops.

Hi there! While you are here do you want to take a minute to sign up for HER’S weekly newsletter? There’ll be inside gist from our #WhatSheSaid series and other fun stuff. It’ll only take 15 seconds. Yes, I timed it.

You'll like this

June 3, 2019

Every week, we ask anonymous people to give us a window into their relationship with the Naira – their secret Naira Life. When was the first time you earned money? A scholarship when I was in 100-level. The money wasn’t coming to me – it was going to my dad’s account – but it was […]

Toketemu Ohwovoriole

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

Watch

Now on Zikoko

May 27, 2020

DJ Spinall — “Pressure” ft. Dice Ailes Many Nigerian DJs try, but few are able to orchestrate a banger quite like DJ Spinall. For his latest effort, the Dice Ailes-assisted “Pressure”, he proves that he still remains undefeated. That being said, “Pressure” is Dice Ailes’ show through and through. The criminally underrated star shines on […]

Recommended Quizzes

November 7, 2019

These days, everyone is always talking about how much sex they’re getting, or how little sex they’re getting, or how disgusting sex is etc. There’s just so much talk about sex, it’s almost impossible to know who’s lying and who’s telling the truth. In anticipation of our new series about the sex lives of young […]

are you ready to get married
February 26, 2020

Are you all set for marriage, or are you still figuring it out? Well, if you’re curious to know the answer, then this is the quiz for you. All you have to do is create your own ideal Nollywood wedding film, and we’ll tell you if you’re ready to say “I do”. Go ahead:

What are you like in a relationship?
February 7, 2020

Your taste in music can say a lot about you, and this time, it’s going to reveal what you are like in a relationship. So, pick a few of your favourite Nigerian love songs, and we’ll let you know if you’re typically a distant, passionate or unbothered partner. Here you go:

November 15, 2019

There are two types of people in Nigeria right now: those who are proud Marlians, and those who are still in denial about stanning the divisive star. So, for those who proudly wear the Marlian tag, we made a quiz to test how well you really know Naira Marley. If you get more than 6 […]

April 1, 2020

Everyone has a Nigerian bank that matches their personality. You could either be as likeable as GTB, as efficient as Access or as mature as First Bank. Either way, all you have to do is take this quiz and we’ll let you know with almost 100% certainty. So, go ahead:

December 5, 2019

We already tried to guess how much you have in your account and your current net worth, and we think we did a pretty great job (keep any complaints to yourself). Now, we’re going to try and guess your monthly salary based on your relationship with money. Oya, take the quiz:

More from Her

May 27, 2020

For the people who might not know what exactly is a BBL?  A BBL is what all your favourite celebrities are getting done, so they can look snatched, but lying that they are working out. The full meaning is – Brazilian Butt Lift. It’s plastic surgery but doesn’t even have silicone and stuff. Fat is […]

May 13, 2020

Nigerian hairdressers are in an untouchable league of their own. You can’t live without them, you can’t live with them. Here are some of the funny and annoying things they love doing: 1. They love their product mixes- Coconut oil, shea butter, and vaseline in one container. It’s never just one product in there, it […]

May 13, 2020

Toxic relationships are one of the nightmares of adulting. They are bad for your health all around, but sometimes it’s not easy recognizing that you are actually in one. Because we are like your internet guardian angels, giving you all the guides you need to navigate this adulting thing we decided to make this list […]

May 13, 2020

When conversation starts to wane, one of the questions that often comes up with my group of all single friends ironically is ‘what would you do if you found out your partner was cheating’. Over the years the reply to that question has evolved for most of them from ‘dump his ass and burn his […]

May 11, 2020

On day 847? of my now self-imposed lock down, while my clothes are charging up for the inevitable post-rona rocks and my body is getting the rest it deserves, my hair is wallowing in a state I like to describe as – I prefer not to speak. From wash days every week, to discovering my […]

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.
March 12, 2020
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.
February 6, 2020
Who doesn't want to find love? In our bid to help, we paired up a bunch of single Nigerians, sending them on an all-expense paid date, and interviewing them before and after they met.
January 27, 2020
Nigerians Talk is what happened when a motley crew of young Nigerians were put in front of a camera and asked a bunch of apparently random questions about life, love, money and more.
September 24, 2019
A group of Zikoko staff go on a road trip to every mainland country in ECOWAS West Africa
May 5, 2020
For the second season, we put an even more diverse motley crew of young Nigerians in front of a camera and asked them random questions about love, school experiences and more.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.