Right before her wedding, the older women in a woman’s life will gather round to offer advice and send her off with prayers to her husband’s house. Most of the advice is predictable; be patient with your husband, take care of him, be prayerful, e.t.c.
But there is one piece of advice that doesn’t make it to the wedding sermon or the groom’s ears: have a building or two somewhere that your husband doesn’t know about.
On the last episode of Nigerians Talk, four Nigerians debated whether or not this is good advice.
Owning Property is a Fundamental Human Right — Miami
For people who do not know, the Nigerian constitution gives every woman the right to own property once she turns 21, whether she’s married or not. Owning property is not a privilege that comes with marriage. A woman does not need anybody’s consent to buy real estate. Seeking a husband’s consent before buying property is an outdated custom.
There’s a Difference Between Telling Your Partner and Asking for Permission — Edwina
A woman old enough to get married and buy land is an adult, not a child in need of approval before taking any action. Knowledge should be about communication, not control. In Edwina’s view, informing your husband that you’re purchasing property is a courtesy, not an invitation to give or withhold permission. She believes there should be no problem with telling your husband that you want to buy property, except, of course, you’ve married your worst enemy or the weapon fashioned against you.
There’s a Problem with the Relationship When There’s a Need to Buy Property in Secret — Ovie
Marriage is a partnership, not a dictatorship. Big decisions such as buying land shouldn’t be made in secret. This is a rule that applies to both partners. When a person finds out that their spouse bought property behind their back, it dents trust in the relationship.
Ovie believes a woman buying property in secret may give her husband the impression that she is preparing for a divorce or that someone else,like a sugar daddy,funded the purchase. In a scenario where a wife is buying property in secret, the wife who is hiding and the husband that the purchase is being hidden from need to do some serious soul-searching because something is wrong with the marriage.
Having Assets is Synonymous with Security and Autonomy — Miami
Both partners should be able to buy properties in their own name. A man shouldn’t feel threatened by his wife’s economic power, but we can’t deny that it happens often in our society. Property owned in a woman’s name outside the marriage’s assets provides security for her future. Any man who has a problem with his wife having assets needs to check himself.
Ego Won’t Pay Rent — Edwina
Yes, your partner’s feelings matter, but putting a person’s ego before your financial stability is not very smart. If the tables were turned, most people would not see a problem with a man owning assets that are independent of his marriage. But a woman doing the same will often be judged, especially if she earns more. Still, it is better to be judged as a financially independent woman than as a woman who brings nothing to the table.
Next Read: Why Your Man’s Will Might Ghost You
