• 1. The eba stick that doubles as a weapon:

    Your mother’s favourite.

    2. The iron sponge that is always on the brink of death:

    Your only friend when washing that evil pot.

    3. The Nylon bag full of even more nylon bags:

    For what? Only God knows.

    4. The only seasoning that matters:

    More important than water sef.

    5. The bowl every visitor uses to wash their hand before they eat:

    Because God forbid they enter the kitchen to wash their hands.

    6. The almighty microwave cover:

    Nigerian mothers swore it would prevent cancer.

    7. That bowl with a wedding or burial sticker:

    If not for Owambes would Nigerians even have kitchen utensils?

    8. That handle-less pot that is “older than you”:

    You mother had the pot before she had you. Show it respect.

    9. The eva bottle filled with palm oil:

    The realest oil ever made.

    10. The infinite number of unwashable plastic containers:

    That stain will NEVER go out.

    11. Those plastic covers with their matching bowls nowhere in sight:

    Always more covers than actual bowls.

    12. The blender that smells like pepper no matter how much you wash it:

    Can even try and blend anything else without tasting pepper.

    13. The morning fresh that is more water than actual morning fresh:

    It always lasts longer than it has any right to.

    14. The ice-cream bowl full of disappointment:

    It will never not hurt,

    15. The “there is rice at home” bag of rice:

    How rice is not on the Nigerian flag is beyond us.