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  • The Nigerian experience is physical, emotional, and sometimes international. No one knows it better than our features on #TheAbroadLife, a series where we detail and explore Nigerian experiences while living abroad. 

    Uyai* (41) wanted a fresh start, so she sold her properties and moved to the U.S to study at an Ivy League university. In this story, she shares how what she thought was a fresh beginning turned to a horror story that ended with her becoming a physically and emotionally abused househelp to another Nigerian.

    Where do you live now, and when did you leave Nigeria?

    I live in the United States of America, and I left Nigeria in 2021.

    What was the main inspiration for wanting to leave at the time?

    Honestly, it was the bad leadership in the country. I visited the U.S. before I moved permanently for a friend’s 40th birthday. It was my first time in the city I visited, and I was surprised by how easy life seemed there.

    I was at a phase of my life searching for new beginnings, and being in the U.S. felt right. After the trip, I returned to Nigeria, applied for a course at an Ivy League university, got in, sold my properties, shut down my business, paid my tuition, and moved to the U.S.

    Don’t miss the first-ever Naira Life Conference happening on August 8. Click here to save your seat and be part of the money conversation.

    That’s amazing.

    Yeah, I already had a valid B1/B2 visa, which made it easier to convert and do the student route without starting from scratch. My plan was to start as a student, get a job while in school, and transition from there.

    I worked for a tech company in Lagos before starting my business, and I was looking to get back into that field, so I figured taking a course at an Ivy League school would give me an edge.  My plan was going well, but all of a sudden, I lost everything and went from grace to grass. 

    That’s horrible! What went wrong?

    Starting life afresh in a different country sounded easy to me. I made plans, but reality hit me hard the moment I moved here.

    After school, everything just crashed. I was staying with a relative at the time, and things got so tense that she eventually asked me to leave. I had nowhere else to go. I was essentially homeless. All the money I’d come with was gone. I had paid tuition and used up the little savings I had left. I kept asking myself, “What happened to all the plans? Why can’t I find a job?”

    I didn’t realise that getting a work sponsorship as a foreigner was extremely difficult. There’s a cap, and many people are competing for the same limited slots. I applied for countless jobs and didn’t hear back from even one. The money was gone. I had no job, no house, and no idea what to do. I had to start working odd jobs for survival. 

    What kind of jobs?

    When things got really bad, I reached out to a friend and told her that I was ready to do anything to get out of that situation. I didn’t mind if it was hairdressing, cleaning, babysitting or anything else, as long as it could keep me off the streets. She felt bad for me and connected with a Nigerian woman who was coming to the U.S. to have her kids. She needed a stay-in help, and the job came with accommodation. It was in another state, but I didn’t think twice. She offered $1,200/month. I had less than $10 in my account, so of course I said yes.

    But that decision changed everything again for the worse. This woman turned out to be verbally, emotionally, and physically abusive. The insults started from day one. I couldn’t eat what I wanted. She policed everything. There was a time she yelled at me for buying cookies with my own money. She only permitted me to have one egg and a loaf of bread every day of the week. I worked nonstop, barely sleeping, looking after newborn twins, cleaning, doing everything. I became the nanny, the maid, the cleaner and everything in between. 

    That sounds really traumatic. If you’re open to it, I’d like to hear more.

    The very first day we met, she looked at me with disgust. Earlier, I mentioned how she yelled at me for buying cookies. On that day, she sent me to the store to get specific items for her, and I bought myself some cookies with my own money after picking up what she asked for. I put the cookies in the same pack as the other things she requested because I didn’t think I needed to hide them. When she saw them, she flipped out and made it clear that I was only allowed to eat whatever she gave me. Things got worse after that day. 

    In what way?

    She had a house full of food, but I couldn’t touch any of it. I was being fed like a prisoner; one meal a day and constant insults.

    She’d call me useless, wretched, and say I’d never amount to anything. And she’d do this daily. After two weeks, I told her I wanted to leave. She threatened to call the police and tell them that I sold drugs, and get me deported. At this point, my student visa had expired, so she had leverage. 

    She even said she’d lie to the police and tell them I abused her kids or stole from her. And because I was out of status and desperate for sponsorship, I was terrified.

    I didn’t know that making false police threats is a crime here. I just felt trapped. I started sending my location to people in case anything happened to me. Eventually, I told my mum and brother everything. My brother wanted me to come back to Nigeria. 

    But before that, I hit rock bottom. For the first time in my life, I was suicidal. I lost so much weight and looked unrecognisable. And I was still doing 20-hour shifts caring for those babies. At this point, she had stopped paying my salary.  She wouldn’t pay for transport either whenever she wanted to send me on errands. I had to walk for two hours just to buy groceries and then walk back.

    Sometimes when I went on those errands, I’d stand by the roadside thinking, “Maybe I should just jump.” But I couldn’t. I didn’t have the courage.

    There was even a day she gave me one chicken wing. I ate it, licked the bones, and threw them in the bin. She saw the bone and got angry. She started shouting about how wasteful I was because I threw the bone away. 

    She once scratched me with her nails. I still have the marks to this day.

    My God, that’s horrible. I’m so sorry

    Thank you. People do horrible things behind closed doors. If someone like me, a grown woman, went through this, imagine what younger immigrants go through.  I was 38 at this point, and she was in her late 40s. I didn’t understand where the wickedness was coming from. 

    I reached out to the police non-emergency line. I contacted a suicide hotline too. But at the time, no one came to help. So after months of constant insults and emotional abuse, she finally went back to Nigeria, and I was able to leave the house. But I had nowhere else to go, so I returned to my aunt’s place and briefly stayed there before leaving.

    A while later, I met a lawyer who helped me figure out many things. 

    I’m glad you made it out alive

    Thank you. When I got back to the state I was living in before getting that job, I remembered hearing that in the U.S., if you work for someone and they exploit you or don’t pay you, you can apply for an immigration benefit. 

    The lawyer I mentioned earlier helped me apply for this immigration status. It’s called T Status. It’s meant for people who’ve been trafficked or exploited. That’s how I got my work authorisation, and now I’m on track to get my green card.

    Most Nigerians in similar situations don’t know much about this process. I didn’t either, so I ended up staying in such a horrible situation. But now that I know, I was blessed enough with a lawyer who put me through the process. I am happy to share the resources I was able to compile during my process with anyone who needs them.

    Uyai has kindly shared some helpful resources for any immigrant going through an experience similar to what she had. If this is you or anyone you know, click here to check it out.

    Did you ever regret leaving Nigeria?

    Multiple times. I considered moving back. But then I’d remember how much I spent to get here. I couldn’t just walk away from that.

    I get that. What was your life like in Nigeria?

    I was very comfortable. I worked in the oil and gas, tech, and real estate sectors. I also ran a successful business. I could afford the occasional vacation with my friends. I wasn’t suffering; I just wanted something more. 

    So once you left your aunt’s house, how did things shift?

    My brother offered to pay for a flight home, and a friend in London sent me $500 to help me find a place. 

    Then, one day, I saw a post on social media. Someone who turned out to be a major leader in a reputable company was hiring. I sent him a DM, offering some helpful insight for the company. He offered me a leadership role and a 100k+ salary almost immediately. That’s the job I’m still doing today. I also met someone and we’re in love. Life is great

    That’s amazing!

    I’m a Christian, so I’ve always believed everything will work for my good. I’m thankful to God for how far He has brought me.

    That’s incredible. On a scale of one to ten, how happy are you now?

    Maybe eight. The politics here can be mad sometimes. But I’m in love, I’m paid, and I’m free. Life is good.

    Don’t miss the first-ever Naira Life Conference happening on August 8. Click here to save your seat and be part of the money conversation.

    Do you want to share your Abroad Life story? Please reach out to me here. For new episodes of Abroad Life, check in every Friday at 12 PM (WAT).

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  • The Nigerian experience is physical, emotional, and sometimes international. No one knows it better than our features on #TheAbroadLife, a series where we detail and explore Nigerian experiences while living abroad. 

    Tolu (33) took a big leap of faith when she moved to Canada as a permanent resident in 2019. But it paid off—in less than five years, she became a Canadian citizen, homeowner, wife, mother, and soon-to-be U.S. green card holder. 

    Where do you live, and when did you move from Nigeria?

    I live in Houston now. I left Nigeria in 2019 but first lived in Canada before moving to Houston in 2023.

    Let’s start from the beginning: how did the move to Canada happen?

    I moved to Canada as a permanent resident in 2019. It was a major decision because my parents didn’t want me to move without a spouse. We didn’t have any family abroad, so they were uncomfortable with me moving to a new country by myself. To assure them  I could handle it, I made sure I found a job in Canada before I left. It was a Big Four company (and I also worked at a Big Four company in Nigeria). I sent out at least 500 applications before I finally got that job, but getting it made it easier to convince my parents to give their blessings.

    Accommodation was an issue initially, but my dad reached out to some members of his old student association, and one of the women in the association offered to house me for one month. After that first month, I moved into my place and started my life in Canada. 

    500 applications is crazy. How did it feel to start over in Canada?

    It was easier for me because I got a job before I left Nigeria, and they also paid my relocation fee of about $2,000. But getting my own place was a struggle because house hunting is a bit hectic in Canada.

    The months that followed after I moved into my house were also rough– I spent my first Christmas away from my family, and while I was still grappling with it, COVID started, and the organization I worked for started layoffs. Thankfully, I survived it. At some point, I started a food business for fun. I didn’t have friends, so cooking for other people gave me a sense of community. The more people referred me, the more I met new people. 

    I’m glad. Did you experience any culture shock in Canada?

    Back in Nigeria, I was a team lead. I moved to Canada and had to take a few steps back, even though I was functioning in the same role I had in Nigeria. In addition, the people I had as team leads were less experienced. The organization said they needed to lead because they wanted me to first understand how things worked in the country. But I knew it was bullshit. Racism is very subtle in Canada, but it’s there.

    It was mentally draining for me to be on that team and disappear into the background while my juniors, who I was more qualified than, played the team lead. I also had a tough time getting used to how much they fake smiled in Canada, but I had to get used to it. 

    Sorry about that. At what point did you know you wanted to leave Canada?

    I never knew I was going to leave Canada. During COVID, I met my husband online.  He was living in the US, so I wasn’t serious about it at first. But the other people I was talking to were dead ends. Around August 2021, he flew into Canada to ask me out officially.  I knew then he wanted to be serious, so even though I was sceptical at first, I ended up giving in.  He ended up spending about ten days with me and it was on his second day with me that  I told my friend I would marry him.

    We had our introduction in February 2022 via Zoom. After that, we got married legally in April 2022  in Canada. We finalized things by getting married traditionally in Nigeria sometime in July.   I knew I’d have to move to the US eventually, but before we became serious, I bought my first home in Canada. That was sometime in 2021,  less than two years after I moved to Canada. 

    That’s huge. How were you able to achieve that?

    Interest rates were really good at the time. When I got married, moving to the US was a natural decision. We applied for a Green card immediately, and I had our baby nine months into the marriage.  At this point, I was already a Canadian citizen, and that came with many benefits that made living in the US easier even before the green card was approved. An agreement between Canada, the US and Mexico made it easy for me to get a work permit to move to the US. It’s called a TN Visa. So that was how I moved to the US. Our green card is still in the works, but I joined my husband in 2023.

    What’s happening with your property in Canada now that you’re in the US?

    When I wanted to buy a property, I set out to buy one that I could rent out. So, before I bought the property, I made sure the bylaws included that I could rent it out. That’s why it wasn’t hard to make that move. But now that I’m no longer a resident of Canada, the taxes I have to pay are slightly different. 

    Interesting. How did your parents react to your marriage?

    Oh, they were so happy. You don’t understand how much Nigerian parents want you to marry as soon as possible, plus the fact that I was almost 30 at the time. Being a Nigerian girl, you know your parents start stressing when you reach that age. His family was happy as well. Our parents met before we got married, and my parents immediately liked them. 

    I love that for you.  What’s the biggest difference between living in the US and Canada?

    People are nicer in Canada than in the US. At least, when you’re having a bad day in Canada, people will smile at you, but in the US, everybody just wants to make their money. Both countries have many similarities, but I’d prefer raising my children in the US. 

    ALSO READ: “I’m Carrying My Green Card Everywhere Now That Trump is President”

    How is motherhood and married life going?

    It’s been beautiful. My toddler hasn’t started daycare yet, but I have a live-in nanny because the money is better here. I had a one-year maternity leave in Canada, so I had time to bond with my baby, although I only used eight out of the 12 months because I got a job in the US. The downside is that maternity leave is just three months in the US. But having a nanny makes life easier. 

    On a scale of one to 10, how happy are you with your life right now?

    I have a good job. I have a good family, and I love my partner. I’ll say 10 over 10. 

    Do you want to share your Abroad Life story? Please reach out to me here. For new episodes of Abroad Life, check in every Friday at 12 PM (WAT). 

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  • The Nigerian experience is physical, emotional, and sometimes international. No one knows it better than our features on #TheAbroadLife, a series where we detail and explore Nigerian experiences while living abroad. 

    Moving abroad was a dream come true for 21-year-old Ofonime, lawyer-turned-psychologist and the subject of this week’s Abroad Life, but that dream turned into her worst nightmare when the relative who promised to give her a soft landing in America threw her out for refusing an arranged marriage and left her alone to figure out life as an immigrant that knew nobody in the US. 

    When did you move to the US?

     I came to the US in July 2022 when I was 19 but I’m 21 now. I left Nigeria because an aunt said she wanted to take care of me and sponsor me.

    That’s a good thing, right?

    It was until it wasn’t anymore. Let me start with a little backstory — I grew up with my stepfather and mother. I never knew my biological father because my mum left him before I turned one. I never met or knew anyone from his family until I snooped around and found out when I was 8. My mum eventually told me everything about them at 13. So I knew my biological father’s side of the family existed but I wasn’t keen on connecting with them because my stepfather loved me like his own and I never felt the absence of a father. 

    Sometime in 2021, my biological father’s sister who lives in the U.S. texted me randomly. She had been trying to connect with me since I was a little girl but she couldn’t reach my mum. I was a 300l law student at the University of Uyo at the time. We spoke for a while, then she asked me to come to the US because of the ASUU strike. I was a little bit happy about the idea but my mum already had plans of sponsoring me to the UK for my masters after law school. Then my aunt said she’d sponsor me because she doesn’t have any children. 

    It felt really good to hear her say that. I remember writing in my old diary that I wanted to connect with one of my father’s relatives at the age of 18. When she reached out, I thought that was God granting my wish. So I started applying to schools in the US, I got admission, got my visa on the first trial, and then I started preparing to move to the US.

    You must have been excited… 

    Not really. Funding was still a problem. My mum booked my flight,  paid my visa fees, and the first  instalment of my school fees

    Didn’t your aunt say she was going to sponsor you?

    Oh, she asked my mum to pay and promised to refund her when I got to the US. She said she’d also pay other instalments. That didn’t happen because she ended up paying just one instalment. My school allows students to split payment in up to 5 instalments. My mom ended up paying for every other instalment. 

    Wait, what?

     Yeah. My aunt was the only one I knew in the US, and she chose what school I should go to and which state I should live in — I ended up in Michigan where she lives.

    When I was leaving Nigeria, she told me not to bring anything but I was sceptical about that and came with a small box full of clothes. She also told me not to bring my Infinix phone from Nigeria. She gave me her old iPhone 7 and told me she was waiting for the iPhone 14 to be released so she could buy that for me. She also promised to buy every other thing I needed. The only thing I had to my name was that box and the $300 allowance my mum gave me.  

    Did she insist on buying you stuff to make it easier for you to move?

    That’s what I thought, but everything changed after the first month. I started noticing that she was trying to turn 19-year-old me into her child. She asked me to start calling her mum and her husband “dad”. 

    Oh…

    Yeah. Her excuse was that she was going to adopt a child in the coming year and would like them to call them mum and dad so she figured I could start the tradition so the child could pick it up from me. I thought it was a stupid reason but I didn’t know anybody else in the US so I tried my best to call her mum. On the days that I forgot to do that, she wouldn’t respond to me. She made it compulsory to text her in the morning and evening. 

    She had strange rules, like not letting me read in my room, only downstairs. Michigan was cold, but her house was even colder. I didn’t mind until I noticed that she never liked to lower the AC, even when I asked. So I started taking pictures of my books to read on my phone upstairs. 

    Another weird rule she had was not allowing me to make friends with Nigerians because she thought it was stupid to leave Nigeria just to be hanging out with Nigerians. The people who ended up helping me here were Nigerians. I had a friend who would feed me because my aunt also restricted me from eating Nigerian food in her house. Even though she knew American food made me throw up.,

    Ah, no way…

    It gets worse from here. She tried to marry me off. In August 2022, she told me she had a friend who she’d made a pact with to marry into each other’s family. When I heard that, I had no issues with it but the problem came when my aunt wanted to use me to fulfil that pact because she didn’t have kids. 

    Mind you this boy was a 19-year-old, fresh out of high school. I was a 19-year-old who would have been in law school if not for ASUU strikes. I disagreed and said I wasn’t interested and I didn’t come here for that.

    Yet, every time it came up and I refused, she’d hint about how the marriage could help me get a green card, which I found strange because I planned to go to school and eventually manage my mother’s school as a school/clinical psychologist.

    Did she back off?

    For a while, yes. Then she started getting angry about other things like how I called my stepfather my  “dad”. She’d also get angry if I talked about him too much, and I couldn’t help it because I’m very close to my dad.

    In December 2022 I started preparing for my maths exam. For context, I’m not great at maths so I needed to study but she had an errand for me and I told her I’d do it, just not during the weekend of my maths exam. She agreed but when I returned home that weekend, she asked me to run that errand. I tried explaining that I had exams but she got upset, saying she loves me but I make it hard for her to love me. In the morning, I asked her if she needed help with anything before I left for the library, she replied with a no and then said the most random thing. 

    What did she say?

    She asked me to pack my bags because I was returning to school. Deep down I was happy because I could finally prepare for my exams but I sensed something was wrong. She insisted that I go back to school and didn’t even give me time to eat before leaving. I felt so bad that I  told my mum about it, then my mum called her to find out what happened and two days later, she called me back saying my aunt wanted me to go and pick up the rest of my things. 

    She kicked you out?

    Kinda, yes. She said I could no longer live with her but would be happy to help me pay my first rent. Later, she changed her mind and said she’d bring my stuff over to my school. 

    When she brought my things to school, she came with a friend and  I noticed it was only the stuff I brought from Nigeria- she took back everything she had ever bought for me, including the iPhone 14 and an iPad. Luckily, the iPad was in my hostel room, but I had the phone in my pocket. 

    While I was still trying to speak with my aunt, her friend snatched the phone from my pocket. I told her the phone had important things on it like my school codes, a link to my school portal, and my exam materials. I said she could take the phone but asked for some time to transfer those things first.

    Did you know why she was doing all of that?

    My aunt didn’t say anything but her friend said it was because she brought me from Nigeria to polish my life and I started being anyhow. 

    First of all, there was no polishing; my parents were rich by Nigerian standards, and they could afford to send me to good schools and buy whatever I wanted. I also had a small business that brought me ₦40,000 – ₦30,000 weekly. My dad gave me allowances regularly, but I didn’t even need to spend it because my mum worked in my school so I could go to her office for anything. 

    I asked my aunt to let me transfer my stuff from the phone and they could take it. She agreed, but you know that thing that Nigerian parents do when they ask you to go and wear your slippers and come back? 

    Did she take off?

    Her car was gone before I got to my hostel room; I felt so helpless. I didn’t know what to do, so I ran to the campus police to report what happened. I fainted before I could even get there and when I woke up, I was in an ambulance, calling out for my mum. The police got involved after I regained consciousness and tried to help me get back the important things I had on the phone but they couldn’t get the phone because it was bought in her name. I ended up missing that maths exam but thankfully, my maths professor allowed me to write it before the end of the semester.. 

    When school was about to close for Christmas break, my mum started looking for a place I could stay because I was technically homeless at that point. Then my mum’s friend in Houston offered to take me in and I stayed there throughout the break. 

    I’m happy you had someone to help you.

    She’s family now. I also had the support of my boyfriend who found me a job in Maryland and connected me to a woman who’s now like my mum in the US. I haven’t spoken to my aunt in two years. 

    Good for you.

    Not entirely. I was diagnosed with Post Traumatic Disorder (PTSD), major depressive disorder (MDD) and generalised anxiety disorder (GAD). I’m currently on pills because even anything that smells like her perfume or any house that looks like hers triggers me.

    Because of my experiences with her, I now go temporarily blind and break out in hives in a stressful situation. The first time it happened, I just started praying that I wouldn’t become permanently blind because I didn’t have enough money to go to the hospital. I was still paying off the bills from the ambulance I was put into without my permission, which was over $1,000. 

    Thankfully, I started doing well last year; I was lucky to get a job and scholarship that are paying my school fees this year and I’ve made a lot of friends here too. I also started an NGO in Nigeria that focuses on mental health awareness and yes, I got myself another iPhone 14 and a MacBook Air. I just got myself everything I wanted and started sending money back home.

    Love that for you. I’m curious though, how did your parents feel about everything your aunt did?

    When my aunt started acting out, my parents asked if I was helpful in her house. I told them that I was doing chores I’d never have done in Nigeria just to make sure that I was not a burden to her. So we all agreed that we’d keep hoping for the best. 

    But when I told my mum that my aunt started getting pissed at me whenever I talk about loving my family, my mum got concerned. She advised me to endure for a while, get the university degree I came to the US for and come back home. But things never got better and I saw a side of my mum that broke my heart. 

    So sorry. Do you mind explaining more? 

    Sorry if I get emotional, it’s still a heavy topic for me. My dad has always been the sensitive one and my mum the tough one. She never cried but the day I ended up in the ambulance, I saw her mum cry for the first time, also, the events of that day made her hypertensive.

    When that whole thing happened, everybody in my family was supportive- my mum, dad, siblings and aunties made it a tradition to call me every day; my other aunt didn’t have a lot but she’d send $10 or $20 whenever she could. My mum had to sell all her land to pay my school fees and she also took out loans which she’s now still repaying. 

    Even though I can now pay my school fees myself, my mum is still worried about me. For instance, I love tying Ankara wrappers when I’m alone at home but if my mum calls me and sees me wearing a wrapper, she starts crying because she thinks I wear that because I can’t afford regular clothes. The whole situation made her so emotional, that she started crying almost every day. 

    My entire family has been affected too- my brother called me one time and told me that they had stopped eating their food with protein because of the loans my mum was paying off. My heart broke so badly and I had to send money home. 

    I’m so sorry. How has this experience shaped your perception of the US?

    I want to go back home. America is a very lonely place, there’s no community and nobody cares about you. Everyone is struggling, but they’d rather struggle alone.

    The only reason I’m still here is because I want to be established enough before I move back to Nigeria. I wouldn’t even want my kids to grow up here. Apart from the gun violence, it’s a super lonely place. 

    Also, when you earn the money here, you don’t see it. I made lots of money over the summer but I ended up paying almost everything to the government in taxes; you have to pay for heat, water, nylon, literally everything. I’d rather stay in Nigeria and earn in dollars. 

    I recently got a car and insurance is expensive as shit. I had to hop on my boyfriend’s insurance plan. Also, every time I fell sick, I couldn’t go to the hospital because of how expensive health insurance is. Knowing what I know now, I wouldn’t advise a 19-year-old to come here if they don’t have super-rich parents or a well-paying job. This is not a great place to start afresh.

    Let’s talk more about happy memories, how did you meet your boyfriend?

    I met him on Twitter before I left Nigeria. I was trying to break into tech and someone pointed me to him. When I moved to the US, he was already here and we became friends. But we didn’t start dating until December 25, 2022. Just a few days after my aunt kicked me out. 

    When we started dating, he was supportive; he’d send me money every week. Even though we stayed in different states in the US, he’d order and send foodstuff t to me. He also calls my mum regularly to reassure her that I’m doing okay. If I didn’t have him, I’d have made progress but it would have been slower.

     I was initially scared of letting him know that I was diagnosed with mental disorders but when I eventually told him, he took it well. The second time I went blind was in his house, he got really scared but tried to stay calm enough for both of us. He took me to the hospital and paid the bill. He has now put me on his health insurance so I can go to the hospital whenever I want to. 

    I’m glad to hear that.  Have you started eating Nigerian food again?

    Yes, I started eating strictly Nigerian food when I became free from my aunty’s shackles. I cook okra, oha, afang, jollof rice, Nigerian salad, and literally everything else. These days, I even wake up happily at midnight to eat eba. 

    Do you want to share your Abroad Life story? Please reach out to me here.  Check in every Friday at 12 P.M (WAT) for new episodes of Abroad Life. 

  • The Nigerian experience is physical, emotional, and sometimes international. No one knows it better than our features on #TheAbroadLife, a series where we detail and explore Nigerian experiences while living abroad.

    This week’s subject on Abroad Life is thankful he’s an American citizen so he could swiftly move to the US once Lagos began to stress him. In a year, he’s on the career path he projected for himself and even making music on the side. 

    When did you decide to move abroad?

    The actual decision was made in 2019, but because I’m American, I’ve just always thought about moving here to connect with that part of me. I’ve stayed most of my life in Nigeria. I went to school there until I got my master’s in 2018. I know the streets, I can speak Yoruba, pidgin, I’m a proper Lagos boy. And although I often came to the US on holidays when I was younger, it’s not the same as living here. 

    How are you an American?

    The greatest gift I ever received was my parents having me in the US in 1995, which granted me automatic citizenship.

    God when? So why 2019?

    I finished my master’s in architecture in 2018. Then, I finished NYSC in 2019 and hit the streets to hustle. Quickly, I found out one thing — Lagos is a circus. 

    LMAO

    From horrible bosses to the roughness of the city to no electricity to people refusing to pay me for my work because I was young, I experienced everything. 

    When did you eventually leave?

    2021.

    What happened in between?

    First of all, COVID. But it gave me an opportunity to pick up the music career I’d dropped for years. I used that period to make music and film about my experience in Lagos, how Lagos — and Nigeria — hinders the progress of young people.

    Did you have to quit your music career when you moved?

    Nope. The plan was to come here, get a job in my field — architecture or construction — grow my career and still make my music on the side. 

    How’s that going?

    Pretty great. I’ve got a job here as a construction manager — someone who receives a project on behalf of a client and makes sure all documents and processes are intact before the actual building begins. And the money is good; or at least, far better than what I would’ve made in Nigeria.

    And the music? 

    I’ve made progress. I’m even in the process of making an animated video for one of my songs as we speak. It was definitely the right choice to move.

    Does it make sense to ask about your expectation vs reality?

    Yes, because before I came in 2021, the last time I was here was when I was a teenager in 2009. When I showed the immigration officer my passport, she was shocked but happy to welcome me back home. There was definitely some culture shock. 

    Like what?

    Food. Greens, specifically. You know the entire “Beans Greens Potatoes Tomatoes” thing everyone shouts when it’s Thanksgiving. Yeah, those greens are just leaves and salt. They taste horrible and watery. 

    LMAO

    Another thing I noticed was things are more serious here. Even on the basic human interaction level. I like to call America the United States of Opportunity Costs, Litigation and Firearms. And I think these three things shape how people interact. Nobody wants to talk to you if you can’t make them money, people are scared of interactions because it’s easy to get sued, and so so many people have guns.

    But I enjoy the great infrastructure like good roads and internet, and the many commercial activities like clubbing I can engage in. 

    Do you see yourself staying for long?

    I guess time will tell. It’s pretty confusing now because Maryland, where I stay, is cool, but it’s expensive. I don’t want to stay in one place all my life. I won’t say I see myself returning to Nigeria, but I want to be able to move around.

    Want more Abroad Life? Check in every Friday at 9 A.M. (WAT) for a new episode. Until then, read every story of the series here.

  • Have you ever wondered if your guardian angel made a mistake when assigning your new-born self to a country?

    Take this quiz and find out where you really belong:

  • In case you just got back from Mars, the USA Presidential Debates kicked off at New York’s Hofstra University yesterday, and it was one tense moment! Republican candidate Donald Trump, who is widely known for his aggressive approach towards well, everything, was on the attack against Hilary Clinton, the Democratic candidate. Polls show Clinton is currently ahead of Trump, and financial markets are cheering her for the victory. Nigerians even stayed up to watch the show, and apparently, a few people took notes.

    1. First of all, we are very surprised Nigerians actually stayed up to watch the debate.

    2. This person was just awed at the technology that was used; should Nigerians look forward to this at the 2019 polls?

    https://twitter.com/farouqzaib/status/780604428613214208

    3. To be very honest, we need to demand more from political aspirants.

    https://twitter.com/Don_Kane/status/780656089767485440

    4. Even though we let the last Nigerian presidential debates slip, it really should not happen again.

    5. This person was just here to drag Trump sha, even though we should be dragging the cheats in our own backyard.

    6. And one more person hates Donald Trump.

    7. It appears the US Presidential elections will set the tone for the polls in 2019.

    8. And all institutions must be ready to participate, even our universities.

    If you’ve not seen the Debate, let’s bless you with this.

  • While people in this part of the world were asleep, A-List celebrities around the world were getting turnt at the 2016 edition of the VMAs which happened on August 28th.

    Proving her international exposure status, Tiwa Savage attended the event in a yellow dress and even took pictures with celebrities like Jidenna and DJ Khaled.

    Some of the celebs obviously came to slay.

    Some just be bothered about slaying on the red carpet, we’re not judging sha.

    But that’s not why we’re here.

    We’re here to tell you how Beyonce basically stole the show and put it in her pocket.

    If you don’t believe us, this video is enough proof.

    https://twitter.com/MTV/status/770112782612258816

    This was team Zikoko after watching Beyonce’s performance:

    But we’re not the only ones that feel this way, the internet has gone wild!

    Beyonce is not anybody’s mate.

    https://twitter.com/DENRELE_EDUN/status/770366020104192001

    Why is she so awesome abeg?

    Beyonce’s haters better shut up forever.

    https://twitter.com/sabrina_edeko/status/770168377553850368

    Beyonce is that person that will look better than you at your own wedding.

    We just have three words for Mummy Beyonce, thank you ma!

  • 1. You, the night before you go to apply for a visa.

    Baba God, do it for your child.

    2. You and Visa forms.

    The stress.

    3. When you get rejected by some countries and you’re just there thinking about your life.

    Is this my life? Even this skreppy country is rejecting me?

    4. The moment you realize your passport is lowkey just a wallet for visas.

    When will it get better, ehn?

    5. You, praying that the immigration officer suddenly becomes colour blind.

    He shall see blue in Jesus’ name.

    6. What the line for foreign passports looks like in a new country:

    What is all this?

    7. How immigration officers look at you when you bring out your green passport:

    Oh God!

    8. Your face, whenever they detain you at a foreign airport.

    Why always me?

    9. You, looking at the countries that you don’t need a visa to enter.

    Is this a joke?

    10. When countries in the same Africa as you are still asking for a visa too.

    In my own continent again?

    11. You, watching your friends with blue and red passports plan summer holidays.

    Chai!

    12. Whenever citizens start misbehaving around you.

    Abeg oh! I know the colour of my passport.

    13. When you want to enter your own country and they are answering people with blue and red passports first.

    What the hell?

  • Back in 1984,  Nigerian artist, Tunde Odunlade, and Assistant Secretary of State, Linda Thomas Greenwich, met for the first time.

    Thirty years ago, Tunde, a print and textile artist went to Linda’s window to request for a visa to the United States when she was serving as a Consular Officer in Lagos.

    Tunde, who was granted the visa rose to be one of the leading faces of traditional African art . His work has been displayed in many countries and is currently in a collection of institutions such as the Smithsonian Museum of African Art.

    Thirty years after their first encounter, as if by coincidence, Linda and Tunde happened to be panelists for a discussion on the Chibok girls.

    Tunde recognised her and just had to pay her a visit to thank her for approving his visa in 1984. He even showed her some of his work.

    Tunde Odunlade was the first African artist to exhibit at the Festival of Atlanta in 1987. Till date, he uses his art to address the social issues Nigerians face.

    You can view his collections on his website.

  • 1. When you misbehave and your parents threaten to send you to school in Nigeria.

    Hay God!

    2. You, watching your neighbours with their costumes and free candy on Halloween.

    The devil holiday.

    3. Your house during Halloween:

    Na wa.

    4. When your father calls you to tell your friend to come back and greet him well.

    Is it me that one is telling “hi”?

    5. When you ask your mother if you can go for a sleepover.

    Better sit in your house.

    6. Whenever your relatives from Nigeria call.

    “Mummy, who is that?” “Just take the phone.”

    7. You, whenever a teacher doesn’t pronounce your name correctly.

    Better fix up.

    8. When someone asks if you have an easier name.

    You can pronounce Schwarzenegger, abi? You gon’ learn today.

    9. Your class, when the teacher says something about Africa.

    Face your front, abeg.

    10. When someone asks you if you can speak African.

    Don’t be unfortunate.

    11. When you’re surrounded by restaurants but all you eat is:

    There is always rice at home.

    12. When your family goes for a “short visit” to Nigeria.

    Hian! What is it?

    13. When your mother knocks your head in public and people start staring.

    See my life.

    14. When you see your white friends talk back to their parents.

    Jisos!

    15. Your parents, whenever you brought home a Nigerian friend.

    “Thank God!”