selfies | Zikoko!

Dear men, you never know what to do after you send a woman pictures? Well, we are here to help.

1) Send us money

Looking at your beautiful pictures has caused us eye pains because your beauty is blinding. You have to pay for eye treatments.

2) Buy us a new wig

Your beauty just snatched our wig. It will seem you have to replace it.

2+2 = 4

3) Clear our shopping cart

Seeing your beautiful face has reminder us of how there is an emptiness in our life that can only be filled with material possessions.

We point, you pay. It is the only way.

4) Buy us a house

Because those pictures need to be framed, we need a house. Your pictures cannot just waste in a rented apartment.

5) Book us a spa day

Your pictures got us so tensed up, we need a professional to help us destress. We advise that you book the spa day before you even send the pictures, so that by the time you send it, the appointment is already fixed.

6) A vacation

An all expense paid trip to any location of our choice. We need to relax, preferably somewhere with a beach because ocean water helps to revive people that feel faint.

how she felt when she saw your pictures

7) Take us on a date

The beauty needs to be appreciated in person, and that can only happen when you take us on a date.

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[donation]
1. You, never missing an opportunity to take a selfie:

Even in the middle of a life crisis, you’re there taking selfies.
2. You, spending ‘quality time’ with your friends.

“I have to capture the moment.”
3. You, whenever you see anything that resembles a camera or phone:

Time to slay.
4. How you feel when you look great but don’t have a phone to take a selfie.

What is life at this point?
5. When you ask for your friend’s phone and return it full of your selfies.

Have to take a selfie by all means necessary abeg.
6. What you look for in a phone:

What else matters?
7. What your camera roll looks like:

For the love of selfies.
8. When you’ve taken a million selfies and finally find the right one.

Too lit!
9. How you feel after you’ve mastered the art of selfie taking.

BOSS!
10. How you take selfies when you want your whole outfit to show.

Cannot come and be wasting kacks.
11. You, when your friends decide to do ‘silly faces’ in pictures, but pouting is your signature pose.

You people are on your own.
12. You staying camera ready at all times.

Gats be prepared.
13. You, posting every great selfie you take so they don’t go to waste.

Waste not, want not.
14. How you impact ‘selfie wisdom’ to your friends:

Na so.
15. Your parents every time you take a selfie:

Somebody cannot post ordinary selfie in peace again.
16. When you finally drag them into your selfie obsession.

A family that takes selfies together, stays together.
17. How your friends look at you when you get excited that it’s National Selfie Day.

Yes, there’s a National Selfie Day people. June 21st, get it right.
Anyway sha, don’t mind the haters. Take awesome selfies with the 13MP front facing camera on the new Tecno Camon C9.

1) Send us money

2) Buy us a new wig

3) Clear our shopping cart

4) Buy us a house

5) Book us a spa day

6) A vacation

7) Take us on a date

1. You, never missing an opportunity to take a selfie:

2. You, spending ‘quality time’ with your friends.

3. You, whenever you see anything that resembles a camera or phone:

4. How you feel when you look great but don’t have a phone to take a selfie.

5. When you ask for your friend’s phone and return it full of your selfies.

6. What you look for in a phone:

7. What your camera roll looks like:

8. When you’ve taken a million selfies and finally find the right one.

9. How you feel after you’ve mastered the art of selfie taking.

10. How you take selfies when you want your whole outfit to show.

11. You, when your friends decide to do ‘silly faces’ in pictures, but pouting is your signature pose.

12. You staying camera ready at all times.

13. You, posting every great selfie you take so they don’t go to waste.

14. How you impact ‘selfie wisdom’ to your friends:

15. Your parents every time you take a selfie:

16. When you finally drag them into your selfie obsession.

17. How your friends look at you when you get excited that it’s National Selfie Day.

Anyway sha, don’t mind the haters. Take awesome selfies with the 13MP front facing camera on the new Tecno Camon C9.