1. When you are trying to sleep but mosquitoes are using your body as a midnight snack
2. When you wake up and you are drenched in sweat because you had to sleep in heat.
3. Then you go to take a shower and water isn’t coming out of your tap.
4. Meanwhile you have gotten more letters talking about an increase in taxes and estate fines.
5. Then you have to face hours of traffic to get to the office.
6. When you get to the office and your boss is not around, you’re like:
7. Then he strolls in an hour to closing and gives you 4 hours of work.
8. And casually ignores the fact he is owing you 2 month’s salary.
9. Then your dad’s cousin calls you to ask you why you have not yet married.
10. And your friend that hasn’t paid back one loan is asking you very rudely for another one.
11. When you get home you realise a power surge has spoiled almost all your electrical appliances.
12. Which means you were sold a fake stabiliser.
13. Now all the food in your fridge and freezer are spoilt.
14. Only for your landlord to call compound meeting that he is increasing rent with immediate effect.
15. Then one of your cousins has arrived unexpectedly from the village and expects to stay with you.
16. You put on the news and government officials don’t have anything encouraging or sensible to say
17. And now NEPA has taken light so you start the cycle all over again.
The Nigerian power situation has been especially bad this year, due to militants’ sabotaging gas pipelines up east of the country. In March, power generation capacity actually fell from 5000 MW to a miserable 1,580.6 MW. With the help of the Japanese government however, light, it seems is now at the end of this very dark tunnel.
Brethren, it looks like our situation is finally about to change for the better! Minister of Power, Works and Housing, Babatunde Fashola is seen here inspecting the brand new solar-panels at Usman Dam, Abuja.
The panels were donated by the Japanese government, through the Japan International Cooperation Agency, and are worth a whooping $9.7 million dollars!
We think it’s time to actually fast and pray for this country called Japan, because these guys must be angels of the good Lord.
The newly donated solar panels are expected to generate 1,496WH of power, and reduce electricity payment by N31.5 million per year.
The implication is that you and I will now pay less for more electricity-we hope!
To be honest, we are getting really tired of the NEPA wahala! Every time no light! We can’t charge phones, we can’t iron clothes for work and we can’t even watch Telemundo in peace!
So we really hope this donation translates to tangible, visible results; a lot of companies are finding it difficult to continue operations in Nigeria because of the mess that is our power situation.
We can’t wait for a time when we get to use clean, stable energy, and finally throw these annoyingly loud, pollution-inducing demons away.
1. When you dream NEPA brought light:
Dreams money can buy!
2. When you realise it’s not a dream and there is actually light:
HAYYYYYYY!
3. How you rush to charge all your electrical devices:
My phone oh!
4. You quickly pump water and fill all the drums and buckets in the house with water.
So at least somebody can bath and do one or two things!
5. You sharply microwave what you want to eat!
Ehen!
6. Then you consider the merits of cooking now you can use blender and microwave.
Shall I? Shall I not?
7. Then you remember that if you cook and PHCN takes light all the food will spoil.
Hian!
8. You quickly turn on the air conditioner so the house will be cool.
Like a freezer !
9. Then you wash your clothes:
Na wa oh how did these dirty clothes become so many? Are they breeding?
10. Then you iron all your clothes that are rough!
Work! Work! Work!
11. Now you’ve finished your work and balanced to watch TV…
Finally someone can enjoy life!
12. … NEPA collects the light they borrowed you!
AHN AHN! Is it good?
We know some of you don’t have light sha, but no need to be shy. Take this quiz to find out if you should be getting some or not.
Yesterday, there was no light in Nigeria. Yeah, we know, we know…you probably haven’t had light in 2 weeks. Well, I haven’t had light in 4 weeks, but that’s not the point.
We mean that for THREE HOURS, all of the power generating stations in Nigeria were generating a combined total of…wait for it…0MW!!!!
For once, for three hours, the rich were equal to the poor. But that’s not the only thing that happened:
1. Alhaji Putin, sorry Dangote and co were on the same level with the rest of us
Welcome to the club!
2. Even Linda Ikeji’s Banana Island mansion didn’t have light
Eh ya! After she has talked about the house a lot!
3. For those 3 hours, the depressing forex wahala didn’t even matter
Forex can wait abeg!
4. Power-bank owners were the most powerful people in the country, literally and figuratively
They got the power!
5. Some people didn’t even realize that this was happening, as per one with the darkness
*Cries in perpetual darkness*
6. President Buhari left on Wednesday, no light in the country on Thursday. Not saying he saw it coming but…
We see you, Daddy Bubu, we see you!
7. In those 3 hours, PHCN was busy selling agege bread, a la Olajumoke
Because, that transformation is badly needed abeg.
For Nigeria to keep up with the developmental pace of other coutries, these power issues need to be fixed. *Drops hand fan*
It seems like the mercy period for the Minister of Power, Works and Housing is over. As the former governor of Lagos state, Babatunde Fashola impressed Nigerians and the rest of the world with his dedication and the transformation of Eko.
So when he was handed the mantle of leadership of not one, not two, but three important ministries in the country, on November 11, 2015, Nigerians gave him some time to do his magic.
But now, the believe is that he’s had more than enough time to have done something tangible.
Power generation initially peaked at 5,074.7 megawatts, in February 2015 — which was a new record in the history of Nigeria’s electricity generation profile. But it has, since then, fallen to an all time low of 1,580.6MW megawatts.
Electricity supply has gotten progressively worse since 2016 began and Nigerians cannot take it any longer.
Nigerians took to Twitter to express their displeasure.
Some wondered if he was even in office.
My APC friends, can you tell Nigerians when our Super Minister, Fashola is resuming office as Minister of Power, Works and Housing?
— Lere Olayinka – Aresa 1 (@OlayinkaLere) March 3, 2016
Some were not surprised by the state of things, but by Fashola’s silence.
The terrible power situation doesn't surprise me; Nigeria is a dysfunctional mess. "Super minister" Fashola's silence is baffling.
