• If your salary has finished or you’re on your last leg, I welcome you. Seeing as I fit into one the categories above, I asked 10 people how they’d manage their last  ₦10,000 till the end of the 100 days of January.

    Here’s what they had to say:

    1) “Bless the money so it can multiply like Jesus did.”

    2) “How can you manage 10,000 for 100 days?”

    3) “Fast, and use the money to break your fast at the end of the month.”

    4) “Put that  ₦10,000 in Cowrywise, not Piggyvest. Cowrywise because they won’t let you break the bank no matter how hard you try.”

    5) “Don’t forget to cry every morning. You’ll need it to get through the day.”

    6) “Buy Bitcoin and pray it doesn’t cast.”

    7) “Just try not to breathe because Lagos air alone is  ₦2,500.”

    8) “I’m averse to suffer head so I’ll fist buy beer and pepper soup. Then I’ll use the change to rent a gun. I should be sorted after one or two operations.”

    9) “I’m sorry, I can’t relate.”

    10) “I’ll first buy ₦5,000 suya to calm myself down. Then I’ll think of the next step.”

    How would you manage ₦10,000 till the end of January? Let us know in the comments section!

    [donation]
  • 1. When you realise that January actually lasts for 60 days.

    Can this never-ending month finish already?

    2. You, wondering what you even spent your money on during the holidays:

    Detty December wasn’t that serious na.

    3. You, counting down the days until they have to pay you salary:

    Y’all better drop that money without delay.

    4. When you unexpectedly find money in your pocket.

    We eating good tonight.

    5. When someone invites you to eat out.

    Please, don’t yarn me.

    6. When your stomach sees you drinking garri for the 6th time that week:

    Your stomach: “Pity me now”.

    7. You, contacting everyone who has ever owed you money:

    How far that N100 you never paid back?

    8. When you suddenly become a world-class accountant.

    Brokeness is the best teacher.

    9. You, wondering whether to swallow your pride and beg your parents for money:

    This adulting life sha.

    10. Your cart, when you go grocery shopping:

    Can’t afford to get carried away.

    11. You to your Uber and Bolt app:

    I’m going back to my first love: Danfos.

    12. When you lose all the holiday weight because you’re starving.

    The only silver lining.

    13. You, calculating how 5k will last you for 2 weeks:

    It must happen oh.

  • 1. So you must have checked your calendar today hoping to see something other than January…

    Like payday, or that it’s your birthday!

    2. But unfortunately, we are still in January!

    Can you imagine?

    3. What kind of nonsense stress is this?

    We already have enough problems!

    4. How are we still in January?

    Someone tell me please!

    5. It feels like it has been January for six months!

    At the very least!

    6. So why is the calendar still counting days in January?

    Maybe there is an error somewhere.

    7. Meanwhile, your bank account is like:

    Something that has been empty since December!

    8. And you are already tired of the month, and all it’s wahala!

    Stress levels through the roof!

    9. But for some reason, January has refused to go away!

    Why?

    10. We just want to use this opportunity to beg this unnecessarily long month…

    Please, please and please!

    11. Come and be going please! We are all sick and tired of you!

    Thank you fo your co-operation!
  • 1. You have to go back to work after enjoying your holiday.

    2. Your crush is now too busy for you.

    3. Meanwhile your boyfriend is still there, making noise and being a nuisance.

    4. Your bank account is in shambles….

    5. … but you still have so many bills to pay.

    6. Your aunties resume their “when will you marry” campaign.

    7. And if you have kids, no one has magically paid your their school fees for the term.

    8. So you’re just praying to make it, like:

    9. Everyday you wake up and check the date but somehow it has not passed the 15th of January.

    10. Meanwhile every minute seems 6 hours long.

    11. Anyway you’re a champion, so you survive…. only to face February like…

  • 1. You foolishly finished all your money in December on Christmas rocks.

    2. And January was just looking at you like:

    3. When you check your bank account on the first week of January:

    4. On top of all that gbese, you now have to pay school fees.

    5. Your onigbeses, when you call them to ask for your money:

    6. When you want to be a better person in 2017 but January is already trying you:

    7. When your boss asks you to resume on January 2:

    8. So you kuku break all your resolutions on the 15th because you cannot come and die.

    9. You, when January finally comes to an end: