• 1. Just sleep.

    You probably had to wake up at 5A.M. But keep one eye open, before they chance you.

    2. Make friends with your fellow queuers.

    Nigerians are nothing if not friendly in crisis.

    3. Write a book.

    We hear that suffering increases creativity.

    4. Turn it into a picnic.

    LMAO! Bring the rest of your family to join in the wait – along with food.

    5. Start a small business – pure water, bottled water, cold drinks, novels, hand fan etc.

    What do you think your boot is for?

    6. Write a Nigerian song.

    Eedris, African China…they found inspiration in our hopelessness. Honestly, it’s not that hard.

    7. Find your bae. Your type will surely be on one of the queues.

    With the amount of people queuing, if you don’t find someone in one of the petrol stations, it’s your fault.

    8. Get your summer bod ready.

    Those kegs and generator tanks are useful for lifting.

    9. Take a faux-deep, over edited artistic shot of real Lagos life. Caption: Beauty Within The Madness.

    Please. Please. We are all artists.

    10. Create a snapchat film. You can still be woke in your suffering.

    Yass Queen!

    11. Start a Twitter fight about how fuel queues are killing feminism or slutshaming.

    That should occupy you for an hour…or seven.

    12. Test your partner for marriage readiness.

    If they queue with you, walk down the altar.
  • A large percentage of Nigerians reading this right now are currently battling fuel scarcity and erratic supply of electricity.

    When NEPA refuses to bring the light and fuel for generator is also scarce.

    In a dire situation as this, you’d think Nigerian leaders would try and calm the already angry and impatient Nigerians.

    However, President Buhari’s media aide during an interview with Channels Television dropped his very ‘wise’ solution to Nigeria’s electricity problems.

    He claimed that petroleum pipeline vandals were responsible for the poor supply of electricity.

    He went on to shock Nigerians with this statement.

    https://twitter.com/Seyi__/status/714384703793590272
    “… So if some people are crying that they are in darkness, they should go and hold those that vandalized the pipelines, that’s it!”

    When there’s no fuel and light but your government still wants you to fight some people.

    Will Nigerians stand for this?

    https://twitter.com/XANTAPLUS/status/714717304550998016?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

    They certainly do not deserve such betrayal.

    Should such statements be made by a Special Adviser to the President?

    https://twitter.com/_Enrikay/status/714713956888215554?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

    How much more drama will Nigerians go through in the hands of government officials?

    When did civilians become responsible for tackling pipeline vandals?

    He should kuku give us all guns.

    No wonder!

    Perhaps the misyarning will stop if the President considers this idea.

  • 1. When you had no idea there was scarcity till you got to the filling station.

    You didn’t now come with extra money.

    2. When the scarcity waited till your tank was on reserve to start.

    What is this evil?

    3. When the attendant that usually asks “anything for us?” starts using you to catch trips.

    Wow bro. WOW!

    4. When it’s during scarcity that power supply decides to be useless.

    You people are clearly mad.

    5. When you only have small fuel in your generator so you have to wait for the perfect moment to use it.

    Can’t just on it anyhow again.

    6. When you put on your gen and your neighbors come over.

    Oh? We are all familiar now?

    7. When you hear there is a filling station with small queue.

    GET OUT OF MY WAY!!!

    8. When someone tries to enter your front on the queue.

    All of us will just die here. Nobody will buy fuel again.

    9. When those black market sellers try to get your attention.

    Please come and be going.

    10. When the conductor doubles the transport fare.

    Na wa. On top small fuel scarcity?

    11. When you realize you’ll have to start trekking to more places.

    I’m ready.

    12. When you start regretting past driving decisions.

    13. When you see someone carrying full keg.

    14. When someone invites you out.

    Better sit down in your house.

    15. When you realize boys are no longer smiling.

    Can’t be trusting Nigerians when scarcity hits.

    16. When traffic increases and you’re wondering where people are getting fuel to even be on the road.

    You people should go home, abeg.

    17. When someone asks you to put on the AC in your car.

    It’s like you’re a mad person. So, what are your current fuel scarcity struggles?