dining hall | Zikoko!

1. When they serve you yam as hard as rocks.

Is it me that will eat this one?
2. When it’s bread and butter day, you and your squad are like:

Hot, fresh bread straight from the bakery!
3. When the cooks now try themselves and make moi moi without palm oil.

Just stick with your eba and okro, please.
4. What of all the times you had to eat watery beans that had stones?

Vomit-inducing food!
5. You, when you see staff members eating ‘special food’.

So we’re not special abi?
6. When they serve you grainy tuwo shinkafa and miyan kuka that scatters your tummy.

You will now have to shotput after.
7. How people flood the dining hall when it’s time for jollof and chicken.

The only time you will see all the big boys and girls.
8. You, when it’s time for akara and your friends say “collect my portion”.

Only you will eat like 3 portions!
9. When your friends now go home and don’t bring home food.

The betrayal is too real.
10. How you enter the hostel when your mom randomly sends you jollof and chicken.

It’s basically Christmas!
1. When a senior wants to punish you some minutes to dining time.

Don’t let the devil use you.
2. When your provisions have finished and you hear dining bell.

Can’t come and carry last.
3. When you can see them about to close the dining hall door.

God forbid.
4. When someone tries to jump the line to collect food.

Please just respect yourself.
5. When the dining hall prefect asks “who wants extra plantain?”

See question oh!
6. You, watching two seniors fight in the dining hall.

Are you not entertained?
7. How the dining hall looks when the food is jollof rice and chicken:

Who no like better thing?
8. When you get to the hall 5 minutes late and you hear food has finished.

Are you people animals?
9. The hall, when a senior declares “MASSACRE”:

Every man for himself.
10. How you eat when your guy gets chosen to be dining hall prefect:

WINNING!
11. When they take light in the hall and everyone starts shouting.

Are you people not Nigerians again?
12. When you’re hungry and that wicked senior tells you to bring your food.

Is it fair?
13. When someone brings milk to the hall on pap and akara day.

Our hero.
14. When the dining hall prefect calls for extra food.

We hail oh!
15. When they are serving beans and all the girls are forming.

Starve oh!
16. When you’re still eating and you hear “LEAVE THE DINING HALL”

EXCUZ MI?

1. When they serve you yam as hard as rocks.

2. When it’s bread and butter day, you and your squad are like:

3. When the cooks now try themselves and make moi moi without palm oil.

4. What of all the times you had to eat watery beans that had stones?

5. You, when you see staff members eating ‘special food’.

6. When they serve you grainy tuwo shinkafa and miyan kuka that scatters your tummy.

7. How people flood the dining hall when it’s time for jollof and chicken.

8. You, when it’s time for akara and your friends say “collect my portion”.

9. When your friends now go home and don’t bring home food.

10. How you enter the hostel when your mom randomly sends you jollof and chicken.

1. When a senior wants to punish you some minutes to dining time.

2. When your provisions have finished and you hear dining bell.

3. When you can see them about to close the dining hall door.

4. When someone tries to jump the line to collect food.

5. When the dining hall prefect asks “who wants extra plantain?”

6. You, watching two seniors fight in the dining hall.

7. How the dining hall looks when the food is jollof rice and chicken:

8. When you get to the hall 5 minutes late and you hear food has finished.

9. The hall, when a senior declares “MASSACRE”:

10. How you eat when your guy gets chosen to be dining hall prefect:

11. When they take light in the hall and everyone starts shouting.

12. When you’re hungry and that wicked senior tells you to bring your food.

13. When someone brings milk to the hall on pap and akara day.

14. When the dining hall prefect calls for extra food.

15. When they are serving beans and all the girls are forming.

16. When you’re still eating and you hear “LEAVE THE DINING HALL”