• While some of you were busy fighting on Twitter, sharp people have seized the bae off social media and are even happily married with kids.

    We were jejely minding our business, when this Twitter user, Frank, shared the story of how he met his wife on Twitter. Just look at that suit.

    He was surprised she even replied his DMs, with that suit on.

    It really goes down in the DMs.

    She even stopped him from overspending on their 2nd date

    Hope some of you are taking notes for this year’s Valentine’s Day o.

    They even took selfies in a keke.

    They look so good together.

    Goals!

    What a beautiful family!

    Awww! We’re not crying, we’re just cutting onions.

    Now they’re happily married with a beautiful daughter! We hope some of you stop doing shakara and reply your DMs.

  • This nice Twitter user, @Goldenpolaroid, blessed us with adorable pictures of his parents celebrating their anniversary.

    The absolute cuteness of these pictures are giving us serious marriage goals.

    After 21 years of marriage, it looks like this couple’s love is stronger than anything, *hope you’re taking notes?*.

    This couple wants us to go and marry sha.

  • So a few months after my boyfriend broke up with me, I bumped into him at a restaurant!

    Oh no!

    He was with one hot babe, looking happy and satisfied!

    Can you imagine?

    Meanwhile I had been crying day and night.

    As if somebody died!

    Eating every and anything edible.

    Kai!

    And generally behaving like the world had come to an end.

    What is this world without love?

    After seeing him looking so happy and satisfied I decided to change.

    If he can move on, so can I!

    So the first thing I decided to do was join a gym.

    And become the hottest babe in Nigeria!

    When I got there I saw so many men looking delicious.

    Hunks everywhere!

    I decided I must impress them by force, by fire.

    Yes oh!

    So first I spent some time stretching.

    Before muscle pull would come and finish me on one machine.

    Right after that, I got on a treadmill.

    To run from my problems.

    After a leisurely 3 minute stroll, I decided to increase the speed and incline.

    Because I’m the baddest babe.

    After 2 minutes and 11 second, I was like:

    Hayyy I have entered one chance.

    After 2 minutes and 53 seconds I was like:

    Somebody please help me.

    By the time I got to 3 minutes and 5 seconds I knew I had to stop:

    It’s all over oh!

    People of God that is how I fell on the treadmill oh!

    See shame oh!

    All of a sudden I was surrounded by a few of the gym hunks, who had rushed over to see if I was okay.

    Hmm could this be my silver lining?

    One of them said “you should really take it easy if you haven’t done this before”.

    Uncle is that what we are talking about now?

    I even heard a few laughing.

    Will this shame never end?

    When I finally stood up, I saw my ex staring right at me!

    HAYYYYYYYY!What is this one doing here?

    Before I could collapse from shame all over again I hobbled out of that place.

    Na wa oh!

    I have never gone back to that gym.

    So that they can point and laugh at me abi?

    And I blame it on that my useless ex boyfriend.

    Wretched guy!
  • 1. When you leave teen church and realise you are now a member of adult church:

    Ahn ahn! Just like that?

    2. When someone suggests you join the choir/drama/ushering department because “singles are many there”:

    Sorry please who asked you?

    3. When the pastor starts giving marriage tips and marriage is sounding like punishment:

    It’s kuku not by force!

    4. How your newly engaged friends leave singles fellowship:

    “I am not one of them.”

    5. When your newly engaged church friend is already dispensing relationship advice during bible study:

    Uncle shey you will marry first before you start doing abebelube!

    6. When people start saying you’ll “find your Boaz/Proverbs 31 woman”:

    Hello please did I tell you they are my spec?

    7. How people look at you when they see you with different friends of the opposite sex 3 weeks in a row:

    Someone cannot have friends in peace!

    8. When people in church think you and your friend are “courting”:

    HELLO PLEASE LET’S OBSERVE CALM DOWN!

    9. When there is yet another singles conference:

    Is it every month?

    10. When someone claims God told them you are going to be their wife/husband:

    Please he did not tell me oh!

    11. When couples start feeling cool in church:

    Please did Jesus marry?

    12. How your parents looks at you when the pastor asks single people to stand up for prayers:

    Oya stand up so you can leave their house!

  • So l had been seeing my boyfriend for almost a year.

    Sweet and juicy love!

    And so he said it was a good time for him to meet my parents.

    Ehn?

    And because I have crazy Nigerian parents, we planned and plotted for almost 2 weeks so nothing would go wrong.

    Its not easy like that oh!

    I even prayed and fasted just in case.

    One week dry fasting so even heaven knows that I’m serious.

    The great day arrived and I was so nervous and stressed.

    What am I doing for goodness sake?

    Unfortunately (or fortunately), after all my planning my parents were stuck in traffic.

    So I have to do another prayer again?

    So after waiting for 3 hours, my boyfriend and I gave up on waiting.

    Abeg we cannot come and die oh!

    I escorted him to the car and kissed him goodbye (a bit too passionately but that is young sweet love).

    Sweetest love!

    Lo and behold, I turned around and saw my parents standing in front of the gate, looking at the both of us.

    HAYYYY!

    My mother was like:

    Shame on you!

    My father was like:

    “This girl has spoilt oh!”

    My boyfriend was like:

    He could not even talk. Mumu!

    I was like:

    Why always me oh? Why always me?

    That’s how I started stammering and trying to introduce this man that was licking my mouth and holding my waist.

    “P-P-Please allow me explain”

    Before I could even explain properly my mother was like:

    Ah! Yes ma! Sorry ma!

    My father was like:

    Ewo!

    My father even chased him away.

    It was so embarrassing!

    It took me a while to explain and explain that they “caught us at a bad time” and he’s a really great person.

    Please you people come and see my life outside oh.

    And they even finally agreed to meet him properly.

    Ayyyyy finally!

    BUT they still refer to him as “that one that was biting your mouth outside our gate abi?”

    Can you imagine?