Welcome to this Episode of “This is Nigeria”. Today, we would be placing our focus on our Minister of Finance.
Mrs. Kemi Adeosun
For those who aren’t Nigerians. Let me quickly explain something to you. There is a program called NYSC.
National Youth Service Corps (NYSC)
In Nigeria, after your university education, it is mandatory that you serve your country through this said program.
Without doing this program, you won’t be qualified to get a job or run for political posts.
Now, let me give you a brief history on our Minister of Finance just before we connect the dots to this story.
She went to school in the Polytechnic of East London where she graduated at the age of 22.
She didn’t move back to Nigeria immediately, so obviously she couldn’t serve her country immediately.
Oh, I forgot to mention that as long as you graduate before 30 you are mandated to serve at any time.
She got a job after graduating and changed jobs over 5 times from 1989 when she graduated up until 2000.
Wow, she must be really hardworking.
She moved back to Nigeria in 2002 when she got offered a job in a private company. Finally, she gets a chance to serve her fatherland.
But no, she came back and didn’t partake in the program.
Her career skyrocketed to the point where she became Nigeria’s Minister of Finance.
Such goals!
Nigerians have ears everywhere and know everything. I promise you. Because they were able to dig out the fact that Mrs. Adeosun never served Nigeria.
But she is serving as the Minister of Finance? How?
For some reason, she has a certificate. And a lot of people have come to the conclusion that its a fake one.
At least until Mrs. Kemi can prove otherwise.
Its very important to talk about it because the average Nigerian can’t get a job without having done NYSC.
And you can even face jail time for not participating in this program. It’s that important.
With all of this in mind, I just want you to know that there is a high possibility our Minister of Finance did not serve her fatherland.
But no worries, once she speaks up about it. I’d let you know.
You’ll never be exposed to a crowd of people as diverse as those you’ll meet in NYSC camp. Although the living conditions are appalling these people almost make the whole experience worth it.
There are the ones who just came back from the overseas and will start stressing everybody with ‘that’s not how we did thing in the States’ and accent.
Even the ones who went to Cotonou will have British accent.
There are the ones who were only interested in getting exeat so that they could go home.
They didn’t come to suffer with you commoners.
The ones who just came to drink their destinies away at mammy market.
But on a serious note, they might have actually needed professional help.
Then there were the ones who belonged to the school of hard knacks and only came to have as much sex as they could.
It’s just three weeks, it’s that how the konji is doing you?
The ITKs that were always volunteering for everything.
They didn’t rest until they became platoon leader.
The ‘do you know who my father is’ people?
If you don’t geddifok out of here.
The ones who were somehow so excited to be in camp.
Have you seen the toilets? What’s making you happy?
We can’t leave out all those promise and fail soldiers.
The ones that’ll tell you don’t worry if you march well you’ll get posted to the capital and you ended up getting posted to a village without light.
The ones who were only there for the food.
All the food sellers at mammy market knew them.
The ones you are pretty sure were old enough to have been in the first ever batch of NYSC.
They might have even been your father’s age mate.
The ones whose life mission was to never step foot on the parade ground.
They did whatever it took and were always in the clinic.
There was the friendly soldier everyone liked.
They didn’t have any wahala.
And the one who was only interested in making people miserable.
But who offended you?
The ones who came to camp to find love.
And they found it o.
The ones who secured their exeat with doctor’s report as soon as they stepped foot into the camp.
Only you asthma, cancer, bronchitis and HIV. Take your wahala and go.
So who did we leave out and which one were you?
1. When you’re putting on Khaki and everybody starts shouting “KOPA”.
*Omw to CDS
Random people: *corper *Corper wee *Corper shun *Aijuwaya corper
5. When your friend that didn’t pay gets posted to Lagos.
God, why?
6. How your friends that got posted to Lagos or Abuja look at you.
Can you just get out?
7. When you and bae get posted to different states.
Hay! Relationship over!
8. When someone tries to see the silver lining and tells you to manage it like that.
Enemy of progress.
9. How you search for people posted to the same state you were posted to.
Where are you people oh?
10. When you’re thinking of skipping NYSC and just going back home.
I’m not doing again.
11. When you start making plans to redeploy before even going to camp.
Lagos by fire by force!
12. When you start planning to make excuses or fake illnesses when you get to camp.
My doctor said camp is bad for my health abeg.
13. How you calculate the money you’ll spend on what you have to wear in camp.
Hay God!
14. You, when you hear stories of how horrible camp food is.
God forbid bad thing!
15. When you have to travel by air, another two hour bus drive then 50 minute bike ride to camp.
Kuku ask me to travel 7 oceans and seas.
16. How you shed tears on the journey to camp.
I want my mummy.
17. When you see people actually excited to go to camp.
See these oversabi people.
It’s only normal to be totally lit after completing NYSC service year. On April 14th, the batch A corp members officially completed their service year and passed out from the NYSC program. Here are 15 corpers who were too happy to be done with the Khaki and 19k allowance life.
