My Girlfriend Was Almost Sex Trafficked In Rwanda

January 25, 2021

As told to NerdEfiko

Since the beginning of the COVID-19 pandemic, there’s been a justifiable fear that underdeveloped countries like Rwanda will experience a rise in cases of human trafficking due to an increase in unemployment. 

According to research, unemployment is the most significant factor that facilitates human trafficking in Rwanda, with about 80% of the victims being women and children between the ages of 16 and 40. 

*James, 29, and his girlfriend, *Dami, 27, had lived in Nigeria for most of their lives before relocating to Rwanda for work in 2019. While there, they decided to spice up their relationship by finding a Rwandan woman for a threesome.

James thinks that decision almost ended in his girlfriend being trafficked.


East Africa has some of the most beautiful women in the world. Rwandan women, in particular, are the cream of the crop. My girlfriend feels the exact same way, and that’s why we came up with the idea to try a threesome when we had settled in Rwanda.

The first thing we needed to do was find someone we both liked, so we went straight to Tinder because the people there know exactly what they want. We decided to use her picture because I doubt there are many women who would be interested in hearing a threesome proposition from a random guy on a dating app. After we set everything up, we started swiping for potential candidates.

This was actually how I found out that Rwanda has a thriving lesbian community; well, gay and lesbian community. We were looking for a Rwandan woman who was nice, looked good, smelled good and was interesting. They also needed to be willing to take a bunch of STD tests before anything happened. We were able to find a few people who seemed to fit the bill. 

For the first woman, Dami went to meet up with her, but she wasn’t feeling her — she didn’t smell very good and was a bit shallow. The second woman didn’t seem too eager to get tested. She also lacked the unmistakable Rwandan features we were both hoping for: ridiculously thick and stop-in-your-tracks stunning. 

The last woman we picked was really nice at first, but then she quickly became very forward. I mean, it’s weird to say someone is too forward on Tinder, considering what the app is for, but she was a bit much. After Dami told her exactly what she was looking for, this babe proceeded to send her a bunch of unsolicited nudes. 

At first, we were like, “This person is super excited,” but little red flags started popping up. For starters, the nudes she sent were of different people. The skin tone was pretty similar across pictures, and they were all taken from the torso down, but I could tell they weren’t taken by the same person.

Then she sent a raunchy video of two women fondling each other in public, and when we asked if she was one of the people in the video, she said it was a friend, not her. In our heads, we were like, “Why are you sending us a video you’re not even in?” That was another red flag.

Still, Dami and I decided to meet her in a public place to decide if we wanted to go through with it. So, we set a time and a date. When we tried to call her to confirm the meeting, she didn’t answer the phone. She tried to call us back and was conveniently inaudible. She said her network was bad, so we just continued texting. That was another red flag.

When we finally got to the restaurant, she wasn’t there yet. We ordered food that took about 45 minutes to come out — welcome to Rwanda — and she still hadn’t arrived. We reached out, and she swore she was on her way. A few minutes later, a very cute lady walked in and sat down. The babe had also sent us a bunch of pictures of her face, but we didn’t want to assume we actually knew what she looked like.

Dami and I kept checking this lady out, but she only seemed interested in ordering food. We figured, if she was the one, she would have texted or called us the moment she got there. Dami was getting a bit anxious, so I decided to walk up to her and ask if she was waiting for anyone. She said she wasn’t, so we had to keep waiting.

After about half an hour, a man, who Dami later realised used to work out at the same gym as she did, walked in. He went to the table right behind us and sat down, giving him a full view of us and the restaurant. A moment after, we got a text from the babe saying she was outside, so we told her to come in. I should point out that this person had no idea I was with Dami — she thought she’d be coming alone.

Five minutes later, she still hadn’t come in, so Dami hit her up to ask where she was. She said she needed her to come outside and escort her into the restaurant. It was a strange request because the farthest distance between the parking lot and the entrance was 2 metres at most, and it was already pretty dark outside. This was another red flag.

There was optimal lighting in the parking lot, but it was also quite scanty due to the pandemic. So, I decided that I should go out and scout the area since she didn’t know what I looked like. We asked her to describe herself, and she said she was in black RAV4. I went out and walked around, pretending to be on a call, but I didn’t see anyone inside or around the car. It wasn’t even warm. There was absolutely no way someone had just driven it.

I decided to go back in, and as I was entering, I saw the guy from my babe’s gym sitting with her and talking. As he saw me, he quickly wrapped up the conversation and left. A few minutes later, the babe texted, angrily asking why Dami sent me to get her. This was when it clicked that something sketchy was going on because I didn’t see anyone outside. I’m guessing, this person was lurking somewhere in the dark, waiting for Dami to come out, so they could pounce, throw her in a car and drive off. 

We immediately called a cab and headed to a hotel. Obviously, we couldn’t drive home in case we were being followed. After we were safe, I took the pictures we’d been sent and did a reverse Google image search. That’s when I found the person that was being impersonated — a nice family woman, recently married with kids. 

Her social media accounts were open, so they just took a bunch of her pictures. As for nudes, I’m guessing they just sent a bunch of random porn. Most of these red flags that seem really glaring now only became apparent after the fact. Hindsight is 20/20 after all. 

I don’t think a threesome will be happening anytime soon. Hopefully, something more organic and less life-threatening comes our way, but for now, we are just going to have to make do with each other.

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