When Hannah* (31) was betrayed by her lover, she chose not to take the high road. What followed was a chain of decisions that blurred boundaries with his family.
I met Dele* in 2017 at an Olamide concert. We already had a loose connection because we both lived around Agege*, and I had dated his youngest brother, Ayo*, about two years earlier. That relationship didn’t last, but we stayed friendly, so Dele knew of me.
At the concert, we exchanged numbers and kept talking. He said he had just come out of a long-term relationship, and since I was single, we started spending more time together.
It began casually, but after two months, he said he wanted us to be exclusive. I took that to mean we were dating. From that point, we saw each other several times a week and went on dates. This went on for a year.
In February 2019, Dele relocated to get an advanced degree. He became distant almost immediately. He ignored messages and took time to respond. It was very unlike him, so I assumed he was just busy settling into the new environment.
Around that time, I had a pregnancy scare. I tried to reach him again, this time more urgently. When someone finally picked up his calls, it was a woman who asked me to stop calling. I was taken aback, but I put the pieces together and realised it was his ex, the same one he claimed to be broken up with.
I was heartbroken and confused, but I still kept trying to reach him.
When I finally did and asked for an explanation, he dismissed my feelings. He said he never asked me to be his girlfriend and thought I knew the fun was over. His words were destabilising. I’d rightly believed we were in a relationship the entire time.
After the call, I reached out to his brother Ayo and vented. He had a few comforting words, and we soon grew closer again, just like the old times.
One day, I visited Ayo, but he wasn’t home. Instead, I met Bimbo*, their middle brother, who was visiting from another state. We didn’t know each other well, but we started talking while I waited. Then it started raining. Bimbo offered me a drink and suggested we watch a movie to pass the time.
That was how it started. We kissed and touched each other until it eventually led to sex. It was completely unplanned, a spur-of-the-moment. And I never saw him again after that day.
In retrospect, I did it because I was still angry and enjoyed the thrill of hurting Dele. Over time, I got even closer to Ayo, and he confessed he still had feelings for me. His admission stirred something inside me and reminded me of our good old days. We eventually hooked up, and I told him what transpired with his younger brother. He was upset and emotional, but I didn’t really care. Fast forward to September 2019, Dele finally reached out. There was no apology. He even wanted me to attend the wedding with his so-called ex.
That was when my anger snapped into place. I told him I’d slept with both his brothers and that they were better than him. He fired back with insults, but I didn’t stay long enough on the call to hear. In a way, I’d gotten my pound of flesh, and that was all that mattered. We didn’t speak for a long time after that.
However, I struggled with my conscience afterwards. I felt like I had gone too low for someone raised to always be the good girl. But over time, I came to terms with it. Everyone involved made their own choices, so there was no point in feeling guilty.
I’m not responsible for preserving their relationship or the bond between them. My reaction came from the pain I felt, and I believe it was proportional. Dele thought he could discard me and move on peacefully, but I showed him otherwise. As far as I’m concerned, he deserved it.
That chapter with his brothers is closed, but if someone crosses me in the same way again, I would respond similarly. I believe in making people face the consequences of how they treat me.
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