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QUIZ: Forget About Japaing if You Do Less Than 14/20 of These Things

Japa is not for everyone. Take this quiz to find out if you’re ready to leave Nigeria.

Written By:

Meyimi O.

Date Written:

May 23, 2022

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We all want to leave the country, but Japa is not for everyone. Take this quiz to find out if you’re ready to leave Nigeria.

Pick which of these apply to you:

You sleep with the AC on even during harmattan season

You speak more than one language

You have an international passport

You use the pedestrian bridge instead of running across the express

You make your noodles without extra pepper

You’re from Edo state

You don’t call your family members regularly

You try new foods when you’re out

You don’t play loud music early in the morning

You don’t say ‘short knicker’

You prefer texts to calls

You like cats

You’re always on time to your hangouts

You prefer sushi to goat meat

You’ve never invested in a Ponzi scheme

You gift your loved ones for Christmas

You tip the staff at restaurants

Your favorite color is white, red or blue

You wear shoes more than slippers

You cook your own food

You do #{score}/#{total} of these things
Brace yourself, you’re going to be in Nigeria for a while.
You do #{score}/#{total} of these things
Your mind is willing but the body is weak. Don’t lose hope, 2025 is not that far.
You do #{score}/#{total} of these things
All that’s left is for you to post the “welcome to a new dispensation” sticker, cause you’ve moved to greater things.
You do #{score}/#{total} of these things
Why are you still here? You clearly don’t belong in this country.

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Meyimi O.
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