No child ever wants to visualise their parents as sexual beings, but what happens when you accidentally catch them having sex? These seven Nigerians share with us how they felt when they caught their parents having sex.
“They’ve unknowingly scarred me for life”
It happened when I was 10 years old. I was watching this new cartoon episode when someone came over looking for my dad. He seemed important, so I went to my dad’s room to tell him he had a guest, but the door was locked. I knocked so many times and there was no reply, but I knew he was there. I went to look for my mum and she wasn’t in her room so I knew they were together. I went back to his door and kept knocking very hard but nobody answered me.
That’s when I decided to try the other door that leads to the bedroom. The door is usually locked, but I wanted to be sure I had tried everything. Unfortunately for me, the door was open this time and then I saw them. I froze as my dad yelled at me, asking what I wanted. I couldn’t even tell him that I had been knocking for so long because I was in shock. I just delivered the message and went back to watching television, but I couldn’t even focus. Images of my mum on top of my dad kept flashing in my head. They’ve unknowingly scarred me for life.
“The worst five minutes of my life”
I was preparing to write my SSCE, and since my dad said he didn’t have money to pay my SSCE fees. I came home and was just doing nothing. My mum was a housemistress in the boy’s hostel and my brother was in university, so it was just my dad and I at home.
My dad had a habit of coming home very late, and since we were the only ones that stayed in the house, I tried to not sleep off till he came back. One day, early in the morning, I heard the sound of my dad’s car. When I got outside, I could see a second figure riding shotgun, but before I could get close to the car, he shouted that he would be back and drove off. That’s when I knew he had come home with a woman that wasn’t my mum.
I wanted to find out if it was a pattern, so the next day I slept during the day so I could be awake when he returned at night. When he got back, I opened the door for him and he greeted me and went straight to his room, so I just returned to bed and lay there. Moments later, I looked through my window and saw a lady in the car. That’s when I realised she must have been there all this while. After my dad had his shower and ate, he came to where I lay down and pointed a torchlight in my face. He switched it off and then on again but I refused to move. When he was sure I was asleep, he went to open the door for the lady and they both snuck in through the kitchen. After he took her to his room, he came back to point the torchlight in my face, but I still didn’t move.
I let some time pass before I went to his room to see what exactly was going on. Alas, I saw the both of them completely naked, having hardcore sex — the kind you’d see in porn. I couldn’t move, just kept mute and watched my father fuck a woman that definitely was not my mum. I froze and watched, and it was the worst 5 minutes of my life.
“Maybe if I didn’t know what my father’s penis looked like, I would be fine.”
I have lost count of the number of times I’ve seen my parents have sex. At this point, I’ve started blaming them for the cause of the decline of my mental health. Maybe if I didn’t know what my father’s penis looked like, I would be fine.
One day, when I was 10 years old, I was hungry and didn’t know what was for lunch, so I knocked on my parent’s bedroom door to ask for lunch was. I thought I heard something like, “Come in,” and so I opened the door. As an adult, I now wonder that maybe it’s not come in I’d heard.
Immediately I opened the door, my parents yelped and scrambled to cover their bodies, but there was only one wrapper so I could still see everything. I just stood there, the door open, in shock. When my dad asked me what I wanted, I told him I needed food my mum told me to go eat the rice in the pot. The house was silent for the entire day and the only thought that kept going through my head was, “I thought sex only happened at night.”
“Amebo is bad”
My room is kind of close to theirs, so one day, as I was leaving my room, I heard noises coming from my parent’s room. At first, I thought they were praying, so I put my ear on the door to confirm. If they were praying, it meant they would be there for a while and I could at least watch television in the living room before they came out. However, the strange noises didn’t sound like people praying. Instead of me to just leave, I wanted to be sure what exactly was going on, so I peeped through the keyhole. That’s when I saw my parents engaging in hot fok. I blinked many times and went to wash my face with soap and water. I never mentioned the incident to them and I don’t plan on doing so. If I had just minded my business, I wouldn’t have seen all of that. That’s why I tell people that Amebo is bad.
“Not once, but twice”
The first time I saw them, I was 14. I heard sounds coming from their room. Our household isn’t really one where we knock a lot, so I just opened the door and behold, my parents were there doing missionary. My father just turned back to look at me and asked me, “Can I help you?”
My parents have kuku always been very heavy on the PDA. The second time I caught them having sex, I was 18. I looked through our window and saw my parents going at it on our neighbour’s staircase. I just took a deep sigh and went back inside.
“I didn’t need to know my parents had sex”
I was 23 and didn’t tell my parents I would return from my trip a week early. I had my own key, so even if they weren’t around, I planned to just let myself in.
I went first to my room to drop my bags and that’s when I saw my parents fucking on my bed. Their excuse was that they sprayed their bedroom and didn’t know I would be back so soon. I slept in the living room throughout my stay in their house and moved out the next month. That way, they can do whatever they want on all the pieces of furniture in their house. I didn’t need to know my parents had sex. I still don’t want to even imagine that they have sex. Both of them are over fifty; why are they still fucking?
“I can never forget the look on their faces”
When I was 10 years old and was living in a room and parlour self-contained with my parents, we had a potty we used at night instead of going outside to the toilet. The potty was in the bedroom where my parents slept, while the children slept in the parlour.
One night, I woke up and entered the bedroom to go pee. That’s when I saw my dad on top of my mum, doing what I didn’t know at the time because I didn’t really understand sex then. Plus I was also very sleepy. They didn’t stop when I entered the room and their faces looked funny, but I just went to pee.
I can never ever forget the look on their faces. The next day, they made a rule that whenever we wanted to enter the room, we must knock first.
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