Yesterday, WhatsApp announced that a new feature called Disappearing Messages would be rolling into our phones soon, and if you paid attention, you could hear a collective “Ope o” from every guy named Femi.
We thought about all the advantages of the new feature that automatically deletes messages after some time and you’ll be pleasantly surprised with what we’ve come up with.
1. It’s easier to cheat
“Babe, why were you sending Amaka heart emojis and 12-minute voice notes confessing your love to her?”
*whips out phone*
“Show me. Please show me where I ever said anything like that”
2. It’s easier to lie
When your partner brings up the fact that you forgot to wish them “Happy Anniversary”, just tell them that they have a shit memory and that in fact wished them a happy anniversary but Disappearing Messages was turned on and that’s why you can’t find the message.
3. When you die, nobody can find out you were scum
This way, when people say “Rest in Peace” they actually mean it.
4. It leaves no traces
We thought the “Delete for Everyone” feature on WhatsApp would be our saviour, but alas it has only made matters worse by calling attention to the fact that something must be fishy because a message was intentionally deleted. Now, the real solution has come.
5. You can beg for money in peace without any trace
Pls, do giveaway
6. You can now send risky messages in peace
Last last, if they air you, there’s no proof that you actually sent any message.
7. You can use it to practice for rapture
Don’t ask us foolish questions. Is your name in the Book of Life, or has it disappeared?
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