I am genuinely fascinated by relationship dynamics between Nigerians especially when it comes to giving gifts to their partners. So I set out to speak to as many Nigerian men who were willing to speak to me and asked them who the most generous partner they’ve ever had is. And the answers amazed me.
Here are some of my favourites.
We dated for about 6 months. She had a jewellery business and she was doing okay. I think her love language was gift-giving cause she couldn’t get enough of gifting me. She’d see something on the TL that she feels would look good on me and she’ll order it. She got me a phone because my phone went bad. At the times, I was depressed she’d take me out on getaways for days to get my mind off stuff. I was working at an investment bank and one time my laptop spoilt and she wanted to send me hers immediately. I started the gift-giving thing in the relationship but she continued and surpassed me even, I’ve never seen anything like that.
I dated a girl for about a year and she spent most of the relationship just buying me stuff. On my birthday, she bought me an iPad and paid for a three days stay in Lagos. The funniest thing is she enjoys watching you open gifts and seeing your face. She would buy me things and be excited about me opening the gifts. At first, I thought it was an ‘I buy for you, you buy for me’ kind of thing where she was buying gifts for me and wanted me to buy bigger and better ones in the future but I eventually learnt that was not the case. She was at a very high earning job at the time and so could afford it, she left the country to pursue higher education before COVID-19 started. Yet, even as she is abroad and even though we have technically broken up, she still sends me ASOS and Amazon packages. Most of the shoes I wear today are from her.
I had a girlfriend in Uni who would come over with food whenever she felt I was without food. She had a side business selling second-hand clothes to other students so always had extra money. There was a year where I couldn’t pay my fees because my parents were broke and so was I. She came over and told me not to worry and gave me her savings. I was dumbfounded because this woman was feeding me and taking care of me and still paying my fees. She still holds a special place in my heart.
I think my most generous partner is my current girlfriend. She doesn’t ever come to see me without a gift. On special days – Christmas, birthdays, valentine’s day – she goes all the way. Food, clothes, gadgets, babe doesn’t carry last at all. Sometimes it bothers me because I wonder if she thinks she has to buy my love and when we first started dating, I was worried she was using gifts to compensate for something but the other shoe is yet to drop so we move.
- Names have been changed for the sake of anonymity.