Just like there are some jobs that have been unreasonably assigned to women just because they’re women, there are also some things that men are the automatic candidates for. Here are nine of those things people think are men’s jobs.
1. Check out strange sounds in the house
Once there’s a strange sound in the house, especially one that sounds dangerous, it’s the man’s name to be calling to come and check it. Did they tell you that I have extra life?
2. Face armed robbers
Once armed robbers enter the house, it’s you they’ll be pushing to the front to face them. Does my penis have kung fu pre-installed?
3. Kill rats and snakes
Someone finds a snake in the house, while everybody else is jumping on tables and couches, they’ll be shouting your name to come and kill it. Are you people okay? Kill what?
4. Repair electrical faults
Some electrical appliance blows and it’s throwing sparks and smoke. Everybody is shouting your name to come and see. See what? I’m good, thanks.
5. Carry heavy things
People remember your name when it’s time to carry a fridge, an AC, or the weight of Abuja people’s sins. My muscles are for Instagram, not for doing labour.
6. Turn on/off the gen
Because you’re the only man in the house people automatically think that the job of turning on the gen falls to you. Even when the gen is controlled by a key.
7. Sleep without the blanket
If you sleep in bed with your partner, they automatically assume that you don’t need to sleep with a blanket. They’ll set the AC at 16 degrees and proceed to gradually steal the whole blanket from you, leaving you to turn to a popsicle before morning. This life no balance.
8. Not cry
Whether you lost your loved one, had a bad day in the office or simply stubbed your small toe on furniture, it’s okay to cry. Don’t tight the world to your chest before you give yourself a stroke.
9. Use your entire salary for everyone except himself
Black tax is real. The minute your salary hits your account, it’s already going to service everybody’s needs but yours. At the end of the day, you only have 5k (one ejikem) to manage for yourself.
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