It’s true that Nigerian mums have the best retorts and nothing can take this superpower away from them. But dads are not entirely bad in this area. I have compiled some of the things you likely heard your dad say in different situations in this post.
1. You and your mother should deal with it
This is for everything he couldn’t be bothered about. Alternatively, “It’s up to you and your mother” works too.
2. You’re not serious
For the times he didn’t want to outrightly call you stupid
3. When I was younger…
Prepare to listen to stories about how he used to walk 50 kilometres to school carrying his chair on his head and how you’re abusing your privilege.
4. I’ve paid our school fees. What else do you want?
What else could you possibly want, tbh?
5. You must think I harvest money from trees
Wait, you don’t?
6. Change the station to NTA
9 PM is the hour.
7. Make sure you give me my change
Something he’s going to forget about.
8. You’re not doing me. You’re doing yourself
His lazy attempt at reprimand.