Older men are a vibe. At least that’s what I heard. If you’ve been looking for that devilish voice that’ll push you into bad behaviour, this is it. Say no more. Sit back and read the many reasons why older men should be your spec.
1) They are always too tired to cheat
All these men want to do after a long day of slaving for the man is drink Ogi and read Punch newspaper.
2) Too tired to ask for snake in the monkey shadow sex style
Because missionary is enough to spread the gospel of good loving.
3) You’re not doing Bob the builder
Older men are made men. Period.
4) You are rest assured that there’s no other person in the picture
I mean, he’s already cheating on his wife and kids with you.
5) He can hold conversations with your parents
Nothing sexier than a man reminiscing about Fela and Buhari in the 90s with daddy and mummy. Especially when both he and your parents find out that they all attended the same protests.
Ugh. How did you get so lucky?
6) It’s easier to shine
Just download Whatsapp for him. Go an extra mile and show him how to use Google docs online and you’re his resident genius. Zuckerberg no do pass this one to be honest.
7) Nobody is asking you stupid questions
Nothing like “what are you wearing?” or “what is the nastiest thing you’ve done?” conversations. Where’s the energy?
8) Role play will be lit
You can finally hear “who’s your daddy” without rolling your eyes to the back of your head.
9) Hanging out with his friends > LinkedIn
If you know, you know
10) If all fails, refer to plan 101
Hint: “Shey tori properties le shey pa shif?”
Translation: Is it because of properties you killed chief?
We’re not there oh.
