The Sick Bay Hustle In Every Secondary School


August 8, 2016

1. You, going to the sick bay when you know your teacher is going to inspect your notes.

I cannot come and chop cane.

2. When you carry your friend that just vomited in class to the sick bay.

You will now stay there with them to dodge class.

3. How you run to the sick bay when you didn’t do your assignment:

It’s not me they will beat today.

4. You, looking at that girl that always faints when they are about to flog the class:

Oversabi.

5. How all the boys rush to carry the girl to sick bay when she faints:

See these ones.

6. When you stab class and lie that you were in the sick bay and the teacher wants to go and confirm.

Hay God!

7. How you feel when you successfully convince the nurse that you’re sick:

“and the Oscar goes to…”

8. You, when the nurse now gives you actual drugs to take.

Uhm. Actually…

9. When you go to the sick bay with a cough, a cut, a broken leg or heartbreak.

That’s all you people know.

10. How the sick bay nurse gives you your injection:

The worst.

11. You, using the sick bay to dodge manual labour like:

No cutting grass for me.

12. How boys go to the sick bay when the nurse is fine:

See these ashewos.

13. What the sick bay always looks like during evening prep:

You people should do and go, abeg.

14. How you sleep in the sick bay when you know they are flogging your classmates:

The best.

15. You, leaving the sick bay when the class you were stabbing is over:

WINNING!

Find Zikoko
wherever you are

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.