Are you really Nigerian if you’ve never had to visit your local government? And if you have, you’d understand how important it is to know who’s in charge. So here are some things every local government boss has.
“The bigger a man’s stomach, the more power he holds.” If you don’t believe it, just go to the local government first.
Plastic food flask
They always have a flask in their office for interns who take turns doing the amala runs.
An obsession with malt
Malt is to local government bosses as kola nut is to the ancestors. So trust that if they decide to
do their job help you, you’ll have to appreciate them with money for malt. Doing nothing gets exhausting, so we understand why they need the energy boost.
If you’re ever feeling neglected or lonely, just dress well, walk to the nearest local government office in your area carrying malt, and watch them my dear you to death.
A wristwatch that has stopped working
You think they like coming to the office late, but in reality, they have no way to tell if it’s 9 a.m. or 2 p.m.
Somewhere else to be
They never fail to remind you that they have better things to do than attending to your complaints.
Prove you’re Nigerian by taking acing this quiz: This Nigerian Government Quiz Is So Easy a Ghanaian Could Pass