15 Things That All Short People Will Understand Immediately

January 18, 2016

1. When someone says ‘you should eat more beans’ or ‘drink more milk’.

Yes. I went through my life in Nigeria without eating beans or drinking milk, scientist.

2. When someone taller tries to hug you and you get a faceful of breasts.

Na wa.

3. When people tell you to walk faster like they’re oblivious to your way shorter strides.

Are you blind?

4. And living alone is exhausting. Because you can’t reach anything on the top shelves.

This isn’t even fair.

5. Having an absolute nightmare trying to buy trousers, so you have to hem or turn up.

The lengths, oh lord!

6. When you have to sit very close to the steering wheel so you can actually reach the pedals when driving.

See my life.

7. When you’re taking group photos and you’re eternally up front.

Actually, that’s not so bad.

8. When your friends use your shoulders – or head – as an arm rest in pictures.

Annoying!

9. When someone calls you ‘portable’ as per the generic nickname for short people. Or other equally Nigerian nicknames like ‘mosquito’.

How original.

10. When you have a phobia for crowded places because you are small enough to get lost in the crowd. Or get stepped on.

Rude!

11. Everyone thinks you’re forever 12 even though you’re a a fully grown adult.

Jesus!

12. Your legs never touch the floor when you sit down anywhere. And someone points it out repeatedly.

It wasn’t funny the first 183 times.

13. “Why are you so short?” “Look I’m taller than you.” “You are so short”. You:

Thank you, angel of remembrance.

14. When someone thinks you’re younger than your YOUNGER sibling because they’re taller than you.

Wow.

15. And finally, when you realize that you’ve actually got it good.

Small feet, great clothes.

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

You'll like this

Watch

Now on Zikoko

Recommended Quizzes

November 30, 2019

With No Nut November FINALLY coming to an end, we’ve decided to mark the torturous month with some more horny content. After quizzes that guessed how many people you’ve slept with, how good you are in bed and who you’ll sleep with next, this one will guess when next you’ll get lucky. Take it to […]

November 14, 2019

The fourth season of Big Brother Naija came to an end over a month ago, but the conversation surrounding the housemates is far from over. So, in a bid to keep the fire burning, we decided to create a quiz that tells you which famous member of the ‘Pepper Dem’ gang is your soulmate. Take […]

November 28, 2019

There are so many talented and stunning Nollywood actors that make it hard not to fall in love with them. So, while we all know the likelihood of us ending up with any of them is super low, it’s still fun to imagine a world where we actually stood a chance, and that’s why this […]

More from Oldies

May 27, 2021

Children’s day, a day set apart for kids. Like they don’t win at life already? You’re not paying bills or rent and you have a day to celebrate yourself? Get me their manager, please. On days like this, we can’t help but remember how good we used to have it so we wrote this article […]

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

September 13, 2022
Vs The World is a Zikoko original video series that follows best friends Astor and Hassan as they take on the world.
August 23, 2022
Zikoko Ships is a Zikoko Original series where we invite two people who share a relationship to play the Zikoko card games
December 14, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
November 2, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
October 26, 2020
A collection of videos documenting some of the events of the EndSARS protests.
June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X