13 Lies All Nigerian Children Have Told Their Parents

May 5, 2016

1. “Everybody in class failed.”

“I was one of the highest in class sef.”

2. “That teacher just hates me.”

“Ehn. That’s why he failed me.”

3. “Results aren’t out yet.”

Please God, don’t let them call and ask.

4. “The school said we should pay for…”

See free money.

5. “I don’t have a girlfriend/boyfriend.”

Relationship? What is that sef?

6. “I’ve already finished my assignment.”

I actually mean I will do it in school.

7. “They didn’t give us homework”

I’m free.

8. “I’ve finished reading.”

…finished reading the first page.

9. “They didn’t have change.”

*folds money inside pocket*

10. “Yes, I went to church.”

“The message was very powerful.”

11. “I didn’t take the meat from the pot.”

*cleans stew from mouth*

12. “I didn’t see your call.”

“Are you sure it went through?”

13. “I’m not the one that broke it.”

Don’t look at me.
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