1. When every single Nollywod gateman is named Musa.

Why though?

2. The only gatemen in the whole of Nollywood:

Well, the only ones that matter.

3. How all the gatemen in Nollywood look:

Is it a lie?

4. The Nollywood gateman starter pack:

Too real.

5. Nollywood gatemen and never having sense.

The worst.

6. When it’s been one minute and the gateman has not tried to crack a joke.

Ya not funny sir.

7. Whenever the gateman tries to toast the housegirl.

Better respect yourself.

8. When their madam starts sleeping with them.

Is it like that?

9. When their oga tells them to carry madam’s load out of the house.

Uhm…

10. When they let someone their oga doesn’t like enter the house.

It’s not a Nollywood movie without the gateman chopping a few slaps.

11. Whenever their oga says “If I see them in this house again, I will deal with you”

Hay God!

12. The official Nollywood breakup:

Ouch!
>

OUR MISSION

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.