14 Things Anyone Who Has Ever Driven in Nigeria Will Completely Get

February 13, 2016
Driving in the streets of an urban area, with a ton of traffic regulation officers could be really tricky. If you have ever had to drive without the necessary documents/papers these are things you would understand.

1. When you are about to leave and you have to whisper a prayer

Father, please don’t let them stop me.

2. Driving slowly and looking around for anything in uniform

I have to be sober and be vigilant. Can’t be used as festive season money.

3. When their cars are trying to cut in front of you

Ah, please carry your wahala and go free. Infact, take the whole road.

4. When you are speeding and spot a LASTMA car on the side of the road

*heart skips several beats* Please God.

5. But you realize they aren’t even looking your way.

I serve a living God! Can’t tell me nothing.

6. When you get to a part of the road where there are bumps

This is a trap. I feel it coming. They are around the corner.

7. And you see a roadblock ahead with LASTMA or FRSC uniforms

It’s all over. This is the end.

8. And remember it is almost a festive season

What did I do to deserve this?

9. So you start getting your lies and stories ready

I have to get out of this, one way or the other.

10. And packaging your “happy holiday” with fervent prayers

If my hospital emergency lie doesn’t work these new N1000 notes will.

11. And they tell you to park like you’re a wanted criminal

Ahan calm down sir. It’s just insurance, C-Caution, fire extinguisher, tint permit, registration and plate number I don’t have.

12. But you get there and they only ask you “how weekend?”

PRAISE GOD!

13. So you have to drop something and run away fast

Chairman, abeg enjoy your weekend with this small change.

14. So you leave like

We made it, we escaped the lions den.

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