8 Lies You Need To Watch Out For In Nigerian Markets

June 3, 2019

It kills me when movies make it look like clothes shopping is the most fun experience on the planet. I bet they would rethink that stance if they ever went shopping for clothes in Nigerian markets.

Nigerian markets are designed to stress you. The whole idea is to wear you out so the sellers can successfully use Houdini-style trickery to make you buy a ton of stuff you don’t need/want, leaving you to let out a defeated “NO!” when you get home and all the shirts you bought fit like training bras.

Remember the Houdini-style trickery I mentioned earlier? Turns out that it’s not that complex. All you have to do is listen closely to for lies so you don’t fall victim.

Lies like:

They actually have no idea who you are and only say this to make your lower your guard.

They’re not from your tribe. A lot of these people are bi-lingual and switch tribes depending on whoever walks into their shop. I won’t even lie, it’s a neat trick. I’m super impressed whenever I see it happen.

They, in fact, just called price for you and intend to cheat you. They’ll seem super convincing too, swearing on the graves of their parents who, unbeknownst to you, aren’t even dead.

Wheeeew chile…the ridiculousness.

These niggas will have you, a sane human, out in public chewing on leather belts and slippers like some kind of goat. Next thing you know, you’re trending on Twitter.

It’s not the same price everywhere. They want to rip you off and just don’t want you walking off and buying it cheaper elsewhere.

Sis (and I mean this in a gender-neutral way), that thing is not your correct size and does not fit you die. They say this when they know you can’t think straight because you’re too exhausted from walking everywhere.

LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

You'll like this

Watch

Now on Zikoko

May 17, 2022

Generally, human relationships have rules: don’t hurt me, don’t betray me, etc. But bromances take these rules to another level. Among men, there are sets of rules generally referred to as the “Bro Code”. It probably has always existed, but it was popularised by Barney from How I Met Your Mother. No, for real, there’s […]

May 17, 2022

Breadcrumbing is the unfair practice of giving just enough attention and affection to someone who cares about you to keep them interested. We rounded up a list of things to look out for in a potential love interest to avoid being breadcrumbed.

Recommended Quizzes

December 3, 2019

Are you a professional Yoruba demon? Are you walking around in search of whose life you can wreck at any given time? Well, this quiz knows exactly how many hearts you’ve shattered to date, and before you lie that your result is inaccurate, just remember that Zikoko is never wrong. Now, take it and be […]

April 9, 2020

At some point in life, we all learnt that someone can be very intelligent and still lack common sense. That’s the difference between being book smart and being street smart. If you’re not sure where on the spectrum you fall, well, that’s what this quiz is here to tell you. Take it:

October 30, 2019

2010 was a game-changing one for Nollywood, with our movies making serious cash and getting international acclaim. So, which of these hits released between 2010 and 2019 — from the pace-setting The Wedding Party to the divisive Trip To Jamaica — best suits your personality? Well, that’s what this quiz is here to answer:

November 12, 2019

Are you a single pringle, stuck in a complicated situationship or happily married to the love of your life? This quiz is here to guess your current relationship status, and as you know, Zikoko quizzes are incredibly accurate (don’t quote us). So, give a shot:

More from Inside Life

May 5, 2022

“I hate the internal conflict that comes with the holiday. Why am I even celebrating? Do I agree with most of the teachings and doctrines? Am I still a Muslim? I’d also love to celebrate knowing that I am fully accepted, not tolerated, and loved by my family, regardless of my identity.”

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

December 14, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
November 2, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
October 26, 2020
A collection of videos documenting some of the events of the EndSARS protests.
June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.
March 12, 2020
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X