Everything That Happens When Your Friends Start Getting Married

November 12, 2019

You get the first invitation only first year after university.

What’s going on here? I’m still trying to figure out my life and you’re already making a big decision. What’s the rush?

When they add you to the organising committee WhatsApp Group

Oh great. I’m already in about 50 groups I would rather not be in. How much damage could one more do?

Then they make you the group admin

Give me a break nau. I don’t even control my life and now I’m an administrator in a group.

When you realise that this means you can’t leave

Uhm, you played dirty, my friend.

When they tell you the price of the Aso-Ebi

LMAO. So, you are telling me that I will have to save 40% of my salary for five months before I can afford this? I hardly ever buy clothes for myself.

When they keep hitting you up repeatedly to confirm if you will attend

Oh, look at that. My presence is important to someone.

The joy when you catch up with your classmates from school at the wedding

My people, my people. Look at y’all living your best lives

Then you shift the party to your table.

Nothing much here, we just like to party!!

After everything is over and you calculate how much it cost you

But I wasn’t the one that got married now. How did this happen?

You are still laying low when another friend hit you up with an invitation

You people should chill now. Is this my life now?

When you tell your mum you are attending another one and she hit you up with the “when are we doing your own?” line:

Leemao. Let’s not get ahead of ourselves, mother.

But you consider it for a moment

Uhm, I should probably start thinking of this.

Then you look at your account and know that you’re not ready

Hey, God! This shit ain’t for me. It’s cheaper to be a wedding guest.

Besides, you need to find the LOYL first

That’s it then. I’m going to be that unmarried uncle/auntie.

You'll like this

October 16, 2019

While some Nigerians have been able to successfully free themselves of the ingrained idea that sex is bad, there are a lot of us that still find anything regarding that topic immensely stressful, especially when it comes time to buy condoms — a blatant indication that you are, in fact, having sex. If you belong […]

Toheeb

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

Watch

Now on Zikoko

zikoko - third mainland bridge shut down
July 6, 2020

Breaking News: Third Mainland Bridge will be shut down for repairs from the 24th of July, 2020. This headline makes very little sense because Lagos has been on lockdown back to back for months. That’s months of nobody being out on the bridge, months that could have been used to do this maintenance work but […]

Recommended Quizzes

October 29, 2019

We are going to be attempting to guess when you’ll marry based on your favourite Nigerian foods. What does your fave swallow have to do with when you’ll tie the knot? Please, don’t ask complicated questions. This quiz is rigorous and accurate (don’t quote us), so just take it already.

January 2, 2020

Do you have even a single romantic bone in your body? Well, if you’re not sure about just how sweet and thoughtful you can be to someone you love, that’s what this quiz is here to answer.

how tall are you
March 11, 2020

Did your parents give you enough beans when you were growing up? If they did, then you’re probably around 6’0″ and above. Either way, we created a quiz that can guess your current height (pretty accurately, if we do say so ourselves). Take to see if we nailed it:

November 28, 2019

There are so many talented and stunning Nollywood actors that make it hard not to fall in love with them. So, while we all know the likelihood of us ending up with any of them is super low, it’s still fun to imagine a world where we actually stood a chance, and that’s why this […]

More from List

February 12, 2020

Forget Tunji and Daniella, if you’re wondering who your best friend is, it’s most definitely the phone you’re either reading this from or the phone that’s somewhere within your vision; we know this because you’re definitely a phone addict that gets a little impatient when you’re too far away from your phone. Okay, let’s not […]

February 8, 2020

Yes, Valentine’s Day is almost here. Love notes, chocolates, hampers, and everything that comes with it. But while everyone is being hit by cupid’s arrow, there are some people who don’t even feel the hype. If you’re one of them, then grab a seat at this table. 1. You, when you hear that Valentine is […]

February 8, 2020

In case you have not realised it, Nigerians have a PhD in lying. Multiple PhDs, even. And there are some people who are professors in the art of lying, but we will keep that conversation for another day. Anyway, here is a list of common lies Nigerians tell. Don’t lie, we know you must told […]

February 8, 2020

Anyone who grew up in a Nigerian household understands that the Saturday routine does not change. It is the same yesterday, today and forever. If you are a true Nigerian, then you’ll understand these pictures and their connection to Saturday mornings. 1. Morning devotion by 6:00 AM. In which your parents can slap you for […]

February 8, 2020

Growing up, Saturdays used to be fun thanks to Cadbury Nigeria and Silverbird television. However, these days, as an adult, Saturdays are filled with unfinished work from the week before. If you are lucky, maybe a nice outing or mild to moderate fornication. Still, all these don’t fill the void the way cartoons used to […]

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.
March 12, 2020
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.
February 6, 2020
Who doesn't want to find love? In our bid to help, we paired up a bunch of single Nigerians, sending them on an all-expense paid date, and interviewing them before and after they met.
January 27, 2020
Nigerians Talk is what happened when a motley crew of young Nigerians were put in front of a camera and asked a bunch of apparently random questions about life, love, money and more.
September 24, 2019
A group of Zikoko staff go on a road trip to every mainland country in ECOWAS West Africa

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X