1. When your lying ex says they want to get back with you.

Nobody got time for this.

2. When someone says you should come and buy 150k aso ebi.

How much is my salary again?

3. When your crush asks you for ‘that your fine friend’s number’.

Look at this one we wanted to manage.

4. When your boyfriend tells you his mother says you must get pregnant before marriage.

Tell her to come and impregnate me herself!

5. When someone introduces you to a money-making scheme, and it’s MMM.

This one is sick.

6. When someone starts saying ‘I love you too, but…’

Keep the ELA,  please.

7. When someone says you should borrow them money that is more than your salary.

Come and carry it.

8. When your lecturer says he wants to see you in a hotel for a ‘discussion’.

Dis what?

9. When your dad wants to dash you a car, but it turns out to be the station wagon he’s had before you were born.

Thanks, but no thanks.

10. When you’re trying to make friends and the person says Game of Thrones is trash.

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