If You’re Tired Of Life, Do These 5 Things In A Nigerian Home

September 25, 2020

Life is good. Life has its perks sometimes, despite all its (very many) bumps. However, you might, for any reason, decide that you’re tired of life and living. Especially if you’re living with Nigerian parents. Do any of these and you’re assured of a speedy dispatch to the afterlife. You’re welcome.

1. Put it on your mother’s head

You know how your mother says “put it on my head” when you ask where to put something? Try putting it on her head, for once. Let us know how it goes.

40+ Best Nigerian Quotes images | nigerian quotes, african memes, african  jokes

2. Rub your father’s bald head

You know how they say rubbing a bald head brings good luck? You can decide to rub your popsy’s shiny head. You can add a light tap, if you’re feeling extra. Do let us know which hospital you end up in.

Mozambique police warn bald men after ritual attack - BBC News

3. Tell your father you hate him and walk out 

Just like in American movies. You think you can pull it off? Go for it.

Mad Walking Out GIF by The Maury Show

4. Don’t bring out the soup from the freezer

How to care for your refrigerator | The Guardian Nigeria News - Nigeria and  World NewsSaturday Magazine — The Guardian Nigeria News – Nigeria and World  News

Just know you’re finished.

5. Defend yourself from beating

African Parents Are Lazy Disciplinarians – Believe. Aspire. Experience.

“So you want to beat your mother abi?”

One year ago, we left Nigeria for an 80-day adventure across West Africa. Something is coming. Unshared stories. New perspectives. Limited series. 10 episodes. Jollofroad.com

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

You'll like this

Watch

Now on Zikoko

Recommended Quizzes

October 30, 2019

2010 was a game-changing one for Nollywood, with our movies making serious cash and getting international acclaim. So, which of these hits released between 2010 and 2019 — from the pace-setting The Wedding Party to the divisive Trip To Jamaica — best suits your personality? Well, that’s what this quiz is here to answer:

November 4, 2019

After successfully predicting when y’all are getting married (please, email any complaints to noneofourbusiness@nayousabi.com), we are back to tell you how much is currently in your account. How, you might ask? By using your taste in Nollywood, of course. Shhh. No questions. Just take it already:

November 12, 2019

Are you a single pringle, stuck in a complicated situationship or happily married to the love of your life? This quiz is here to guess your current relationship status, and as you know, Zikoko quizzes are incredibly accurate (don’t quote us). So, give a shot:

November 28, 2019

There are so many talented and stunning Nollywood actors that make it hard not to fall in love with them. So, while we all know the likelihood of us ending up with any of them is super low, it’s still fun to imagine a world where we actually stood a chance, and that’s why this […]

November 14, 2019

The fourth season of Big Brother Naija came to an end over a month ago, but the conversation surrounding the housemates is far from over. So, in a bid to keep the fire burning, we decided to create a quiz that tells you which famous member of the ‘Pepper Dem’ gang is your soulmate. Take […]

More from Inside Life

May 5, 2022

“I hate the internal conflict that comes with the holiday. Why am I even celebrating? Do I agree with most of the teachings and doctrines? Am I still a Muslim? I’d also love to celebrate knowing that I am fully accepted, not tolerated, and loved by my family, regardless of my identity.”

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

December 14, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
November 2, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
October 26, 2020
A collection of videos documenting some of the events of the EndSARS protests.
June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.
March 12, 2020
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X