If you happened to skip the topic, I’d fill you in. There is a picture currently disturbing the internet.
It’s a picture of Cardi b when she was a little kid.
“Okay, but why is this my business?” I’d tell you why.
It’s simply because this picture takes you right back to when you were younger.
It’s accurate in every sense you could possibly think of.
For example.
My mummy said I should tell you that..
..you must play with me.
Aunty, I should write the names of noise makers?
Abi?
You were making noise.
That’s why I wrote your name.
Ahn ahn uncle but that’s not how they taught us in school.
Mummy I think my lesson teacher is teaching me rubbish.
My daddy said that when I enter secondary school.
He will buy phone for me.
Good afternoon ma,
My mummy said I should tell you that she’s not around.
Don’t tell mummy I brought a girl to the house o.
Okay brother.
Mummy welcome,
Uncle Ayo said I should not tell you that he brought a girl to the house.
Uncle Ayo, Mummy said you should change it to cartoon for me.
You’ve been watching ball since morning.
Aunty,
Please I want to go and wee wee?
They gave me injection in the hospital, I did not even cry.
It was not even painful
Ha! You’re telling lies.
All liars shall go to hell and perish in the lake of fire.
In Jesus’ Name, I pray my mummy will not die, I pray my daddy will not die, I pray my sister will not die, I pray my brother will not die, I pray my friends will not die, I pray my teacher will not die.
In Jesus’ name I’ve prayed.
Before we close, let’s say a prayer for Cardi as she has brought some joy to the internet with this picture.
Also, because she’s going to deliver her baby girl veryyyy soon.
In this week’s #ZikokoSYDHT, we recapped the music video for Resonance’s chaotic end-time anthem, “Judgement Day” of the Chinwe Ike album. Get into it.
To save you all of the discomforts of an ill-fitting bra, grab your measuring tape, and follow these instructions so you know how to measure your bra size.
Today’s subject on Abroad Life is a Hungarian-Nigerian who grew up in Zaria. She talks about never really fitting in Nigeria because of her skin colour, moving to Hungary for school and to find her dad, and returning to Nigeria because God told her to.
“My father and I stopped talking years ago when I watched him beat my mum mercilessly and say that he would kill her and no one would ask him about it. I thought I had forgiven him for it but I still remember.”
Your taste in music can say a lot about you, and this time, it’s going to reveal what you are like in a relationship. So, pick a few of your favourite Nigerian love songs, and we’ll let you know if you’re typically a distant, passionate or unbothered partner. Here you go:
These days, everyone is always talking about how much sex they’re getting, or how little sex they’re getting, or how disgusting sex is etc. There’s just so much talk about sex, it’s almost impossible to know who’s lying and who’s telling the truth. In anticipation of our new series about the sex lives of young […]
Kemi Adetiba’s King of Boys movie got a lot of things right, especially casting, so yes, it was a monster hit. Now, we know you may not have put much thought to this, but the personalities of some of the characters closely match yours, and we would like to help you find the perfect match. […]
Are you straight, gay, bisexual, pansexual or asexual? Well, we are willing to bet that this quiz knows. Just pick a few of your favourite things and we’ll reveal your sexual orientation. Give it a shot:
For unknown reasons, we gathered very real Common Entrance past questions to see if you’re smarter than the average JSS 1 student. There are 10 English questions, 5 Science questions, 5 Social Studies questions and 10 Mathematics questions in this quiz. Show yourself:
Nigeria’s leading dishwashing liquid, Morning Fresh, has unveiled Tolani Tayo-Osikoya, a successful Chef, Food Blogger and Owner of Diary of a Kitchen Lover, as its new brand ambassador. Prior to the unveil, Tolani had been sharing the inspiring story of her journey on her social media platforms, reassuring Nigerians that dreams are valid even in […]
When it comes to games night ideas you can play with friends, it is best to consider the people you’ll be inviting so you can choose games that each person will enjoy. Not every time truth or dare, or never have I ever. Here are 8 game night ideas you can play with your friends. […]
Almost every guy has received that worried call from their girl, saying those words that make your stomach turn to water: “My period is late.” Immediately, you will just become weak and start feeling a ton of emotions. Here are some of the emotions you feel when your girl says her period is late. 1. […]
The University authorities released a statement addressing the rise of Covid-19 cases in UNILAG on Tuesday after this tweet was made. Huh ??? Covid outbreak in Unilag ??? https://t.co/LbH5Xv3nM7 – Jahmal (@JahmalUsen) July 12. 2021 The statement reads, Read more here. School activities were going on as normal, even after several Covid-19 positive students were […]
What do you do before you breakup with someone? Well, you should try out any of these seven things. 1) Eat A hungry man is an angry man. So sometimes the reason you want to break up with your partner is because you’ve not had some good food in a while. Before you type that […]
“OMG, I love Zikoko.” We hate to break it to you, but only the true lovers of Zikoko can score 10 out of 10 on this quiz. We’ll definitely catch you here if you’ve been trying to scope us all the while. Oya take the quiz. Psst! Did you know you can contribute as low […]
Everyone is secretly the product of an old Nollywood couple combination. Take this quiz to find out which old Nollywood couple combination you secretly are.
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.
Z! Stacks
Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
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