Thinking Of Wilding Out This Salary Weekend? Let’s Talk.

May 31, 2019

If you still have at least half of your salary intact from last week’s alert, then first, let me say I’m proud of you; second, let me help you stretch it.

Being Friday, you might be tempted to engage in a little of the YOLO fantasy and spend what’s left of your monthly rent contribution on a little weekend hijinks, but I’m here to tell you to calm down.

To help make sure you don’t make last month’s mistakes that saw you counting down the seconds till the next payday, here are a few money-saving steps to take:

1. Stay in your house.

The work you did day in and out this week is more than enough action. Do you really need to be up past 10pm practising your turbulent zanku after 10pm? Because your account is full today, doesn’t mean come June 14th, you won’t be regretting the 5k you spent on pepper soup and smirnoff after swallowing disappointment for the third time that week. Even the Lord rested Tunde, even the Lord rested. (Cat gif saying stop)

2. If you must, eat before you go out.

Ever noticed how your cravings get real expensive once your salary hits, well not tonight. This time, you’re going to stuff yourself with the rice and egusi at home before even thinking of smelling that Uber to the Island. Will there be temptation to order a whole fish and some Henny on the rocks, when you just levelled a half-derica of rice by yourself back home? I think not.

3. Be like this guy

Yes, this might look a little disgusting, but do you want to save money or not? Make sure not to mix drinks. We don’t want you spending money on painkillers now do we?

Extra pro-tip: attach to one of those tables with big spenders, they won’t notice if a bottle or 3 go missing. You’re welcome! 😉

4.Or, or, you could do away with clubs and stick to Isi-ewu joints that won’t gate you.

Now if you insist on heading out, may we suggest a deviation from loud and crowded clubs, to well-spaced isi-ewu joints that will feed you and even provide musicians to sing your name and praises. Best part? You won’t spend   ₦ 5000 trying to get measly chicken and chips at the club or 40k on a bottle of Ciroc. With about  ₦ 3000 max, you can chop like king and even feel like one, Again, you’re welcome.

5.Take your friends along.

Now, to save some money this month, I need you to make like Liverpool and never walk alone. Make sure to invite all your friends to split that Uber. A 40k bottle of Henny doesn’t seem so bad if 19 of your closest friends and family share in it. Plus, you get the added benefit of (crowded) camaraderie.

5. ‘Forget’ your wallet at home.

Now, this might not always work, just ask my now ex- friend Jolaade. Ever had that friend that magically lost their wallets soon as it came time to pay? Then never quite got round to sorting the bill for the appetizer, main meal and desert they skimped out on… well, that can be you.

Side-effects include mass unfriending you and some blocking on all social media, but hey, at least you’d have saved some money.

Which of our wonderful tips will you be adopting to save your salary this weekend?

You'll like this

Boyin Plumptre

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.


Now on Zikoko

May 31, 2020

You might think this is an easy quiz, but I dare you to share it in your (family) WhatsApp groups; what’s that thing they say? “Breeze blow, fowl yansh go open.” Consider this quiz the proverbial fowl yansh. Nigeria has had an interesting number of leaders since independence in 1960 – some were bad, some […]

Recommended Quizzes

November 22, 2019

It can be very stressful when you’re trying to find the love of your life, but you only keep meeting people that are exactly like your yeye ex. To help you be more aware of that problem, we’ve created a quiz that lets you know the kind of people you are attracting. Take it to […]

November 1, 2019

Twitter is buzzing right now, bringing a new conversation to the concept of cool vs not-so-cool, especially in relationships. If you’ve been thinking about how much of a red flag you are, why don’t you let this quiz help you decide once and for all?

April 9, 2020

At some point in life, we all learnt that someone can be very intelligent and still lack common sense. That’s the difference between being book smart and being street smart. If you’re not sure where on the spectrum you fall, well, that’s what this quiz is here to tell you. Take it:

November 27, 2019

Do you have a face that could make angels jealous, or should you really be walking around with a nylon bag over your head so you don’t scare children? Well, this quiz is here to answer that by telling you exactly how good-looking you are. Take and find out:

More from General

May 29, 2020

You know, for people who have the hardest time permitting their children to attend sleepovers, inter-state excursions and any program not designed for the church or mosque, Nigerian parents are awfully trusting when their children decide an education abroad is what they want to spend a few years of their lives pursuing. And when it […]

April 24, 2020

The rise of new Nollywood has brought with it a host of exciting new stars like Adesua Etomi, Enyinna Nwigwe and many more. However, one star who never seems to get the due they deserve is the Lekki-Ikoyi bridge. Vey few Nollywood performers are as relentless and as hard-working as the bridge, who, without any […]

April 21, 2020

They say you can’t miss what you never had. (Un) Fortunately for us single pringles, while everyone is collectively worrying about issues like oil prices, practising safe social distancing and lockdown etiquette, we’re excused from worrying about another matter. One of the heart — being apart from your significant other while the coronavirus is contained. […]

April 1, 2020

Brymo — “Strippers + White Lines” Brymo, one of Nigeria’s most acclaimed singer-songwriters, just released his seventh studio album, Yellow, and “Strippers + White Lines” is its astounding lead single. On the Mikkyme Joses-produced track, Brymo sings about his struggles with depression, his unhealthy coping mechanisms and fighting to find the light amidst all the […]

March 27, 2020

Yoruba people are the kings of parties. Undisputed. They are the kind of people who will throw a party to celebrate the success of a previous party. And they ALWAYS go all out. Always. Aso ebi in place, excess food; most times, they even hire a live band. This list will show you a list […]


Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.
March 12, 2020
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.
February 6, 2020
Who doesn't want to find love? In our bid to help, we paired up a bunch of single Nigerians, sending them on an all-expense paid date, and interviewing them before and after they met.
January 27, 2020
Nigerians Talk is what happened when a motley crew of young Nigerians were put in front of a camera and asked a bunch of apparently random questions about life, love, money and more.
September 24, 2019
A group of Zikoko staff go on a road trip to every mainland country in ECOWAS West Africa
May 5, 2020
For the second season, we put an even more diverse motley crew of young Nigerians in front of a camera and asked them random questions about love, school experiences and more.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.