If Any Nigerian Can Explain These Things, That’d Be Great.

That Nigerian superpower of knowing exactly when NEPA takes light?

Like all the lights and the TV can be off, but you’ll just know.

The origin story for why Danfo drivers speak the way they do, I’d be so grateful.

Because someone needs to explain how they can say ‘alaye’without using the ‘y’ or ‘e’

How you can be in traffic for 40 minutes and when you get to the front, only the Holy Spirit is there?

Explanation please.

Does this thing happen where you’re in a noisy room and it suddenly gets quiet, like one angel entered?

Please who entered? I have to know.

That unexplainable heat once they once they take light? Even if your AC/fan wasn’t on?

This thing has always bursted my head.

That thing that guys do where they say ‘wozup pretty’ to any girl that passes them on the road. What do they expect will happen?

Do they expect the girl to stop, talk about her day and then get married to them? I gats to know.

If somebody can help me show workings why the meat you go back to steal from the pot is always sweeter, it won’t be bad.

Or I lie?

That Nigerian mommy superpower, where they just magically find things that we spend 2 hours looking for?

You’ll now chop beating for not having their powers.

This one is respectful asking pls, pls. But how come Nigerian witches only want to cause accidents and prevent people from gaining uni admission?

Like you have universal visa? Why aren’t you touring the world? Again, respectfully I ask.