New visa, who dis?

October 28, 2019

View this email in your browser

21 – 1 – 2019

This is Zikoko’s Game of Votes Weekly Dispatch. We share the most important things leading up to the 2019 General Elections, and why they matter. 5pm. Every Monday. Stay woke. 

IT’S 26 DAYS TO THE GENERAL ELECTIONS
That’s super close. Have you collected your PVC? I’m judging if you haven’t.

NEW VISA, WHO DIS?

On January 16th, after 13 long years of carefully avoiding the North American continent, our Uncle Atikulate got the answer to many a Nigerian prayer- his American visa was stamped. Finally, finally- he could stunt on the gram that he made it to Trump’s America without any arrests.  He spent 2 days visiting American business leaders, members of Congress and Nigerians in the diaspora.

Great, Remind Me Why This Is News Again?

There has been a lot of talk on Atiku being a maybe, wanted man in the US for the following reasons:

Between years 2000-2008, Jennifer Douglas, Atiku’s wife and a US citizen — was alleged to have paid around $40m from offshore corporations to over 30 US bank accounts on her husband’s behalf. If that sounds an awful lot like money laundering, that’s because it absolutely is.

Atiku was also implicated when Williams Jefferson- a US lawmaker, was caught on tape in 2005 admitting to a plot to bribe the then VP with $500 000. This was to allow his telecommunications company- iGate, win a contract award in Nigeria. Jefferson served time for this, but Atiku remained in Nigeria, to face more pressing issues like running for president 3 times and captioning ‘#smile’ to his many social-media posts.

As Atiku no longer enjoys immunity as Vice-president, there was every chance his re-entry into the US would be welcomed with handcuffs and sirens, a point his opponents brought up as a hindrance to his presidential candidacy, time and time again.

So Is He Off The Hook Then?

Not exactly. The US hasn’t definitively cleared Atiku of corrupt practices. So his being granted a visa, while great — cannot be equated to a confirmation of his clean hands by the United States.

BUHARI, O JEWA KE ENG?

We have to ask, because our president was particularly off his game this week.

Tripping: Parts 1-3

PART 1

At The Candidates town hall meeting, our president appeared to serially misunderstand the questions thrown his way. On education and restructuring, he spoke of the press investigating corruption in the local government. On why the Nigerian people should vote him in, he said simply that he had agreed to contest if his party nominated him. Most notably, our president appeared to be severely tripping, because he alluded to the use of technology in faking the Ganduje tapes. His ambivalence to these corrupt charges is a huge stain on his anti-corruption stance, which, has loudly been the backbone of his administration since 2015.

Parts 2-3

Spreading the cheer of his  #NextLevel campaign, Buhari, 76  visited 7 states in the past week. His state of health was however called to question when he tripped in Kogi state and appeared to lose his balance in Kaduna. On January 17th, while campaigning in Warri, Delta State, he wrongly referred to the APC gubernatorial candidate — Great Ogboru, as the ‘presidential’, then ‘senatorial’, before finally settling on ‘governatorial’ candidate.

As a 20-something-year-old who somehow manages to get winded on escalators, I’d be quick to dismiss doubts on Buhari’s motor skills owed to his loss of balance. However, his lack of cohesion at the town-hall meeting and gaffe in Imo State cannot be so quickly set aside. Buhari has had issues with his health which have prompted his taking many trips abroad, the longest of which saw him gone for 104 days. Is his health stable enough to handle 4 more years of the rigours of a presidency?

The Debates.

Buhari’s Absence

Keeping the same energy from 2015, Buhari surprised a grand total of 0 persons, this part of the world, when he failed to show up to the presidential debates on January 19th.While he had the convenient reason of having nothing to debate with then-President Jonathan, following 16 years of misrule — this year, his absolute BS excuse laid in conflicting schedules with the debate. This is despite having a month to plan his campaign activities around it. Bubu chose instead, to spend the day commissioning the Baro Port, which is virtually unusable until the River Niger is dredged — and carrying out rallies in Niger and Plateau states.

Should have given his slot to someone who actually wanted it, no?

Atiku’s Tantrum.

Regardless of the outcome of the 2019 elections, Atiku will always have a place as Nigeria’s foremost diva, for refusing to participate in the presidential debates. This is especially because he made a show of leaving America to do so and actually made it to the venue – agbada and all.
For his reason, Atiku refused the debate without Buhari present because he was averse to attacking a man not present to defend himself. Which is a bit rich considering he did just that here, here , here and here. Oh and here too. #Smile.
By making the debate about Buhari, rather than capitalising on his absence to prove himself the better candidate —  Atiku has made it all too apparent that he doesn’t care deeply about convincing the electorate of his abilities. A fine chance lost, if ever there was one.

The Candidates’ Plans

The 3 candidates cool enough to show up and stick around for the debates have interesting ideas for Nigeria. Here are some of their plans:
Durotoye — who believes the more you learn, the more your capacity to earn :), plans to unify all curricula, so students are tested on the same thing. He also plans to create 12 million jobs in 4 years. Moghalu plans to dedicate 20% of the country’s budget to education and 15% to health. As well as a ₦1 trillion fund to boost investments. Ezekwesili will set up a national skill program to train 900 000 Nigerians annually to gain skills. She also plans to increase defence spending by 15% to improve national security.
Watch them take the time out to explain their plans, like people who actually care for our votes here.
 .

 

Sure About These?

We’re going to need the candidates to show workings on the following plans: Oby’s idea to have half her cabinet consist of young people. Will they have the experience? Durotoye plans to fund education by dipping into government savings and alumni pockets? Moghalu will cut government costs but treble the police force? Who is this private sector they all plan to meet for money and why should they help? Durotoye will cut costs by entering buses with his ministers? He also plans to give free healthcare to persons above 60 and those below 5. On whose tab? Moghalu has a  ₦1 trillion dream, but realistically funding it? Questions, questions.

DID YOU MISS THIS?

With all of  the week’s craziness, here are some of the things that went under the radar:
Rochas Okorocha
 —  the Imo State Governor and current Senatorial candidate, got suspended from the APC for anti-party activities on January 17th.
INEC de-listed all Rivers APC candidates from the 2019 elections. That’s governor, senator, House of Reps, the whole works — over disagreements within the party. Yikes!
El-Rufaibelieves in his drip. Despite facing criticism for picking a Muslim deputy, he remains confident of a win in the Kaduna gubernatorial elections.
Sanwo-Olu made an app nobody asked for.

WETIN GOVERNMENT DEY DO?

While Vice President Osibanjo spent most parts of last week campaigning to bring the presidency home, he may have popped out for a minute or two to perform his vice-presidential role as the Deputy Chairman of the National Security Council.

The National Security Council advises the president on matters relating to public security, including matters relating to any agency established by law for ensuring the nation’s security.

While the President serves as Chairman, we know how a busy schedule can keep him from attending important things he’s had prior knowledge of — so his vice-president can take the reins and see to it that the nation’s security is under control.

Other members include the Chief of Defence Staff, the Ministers of the Government of the Federation charged with defence and foreign affairs, the National Security Adviser and others appointed by the President.

 

 

You made it to dah end!

You badass you! If you enjoyed reading this, please tell 5 people I spent all night looking through Atiku’s Insta to put it together. Get them to subscribe too.  Catch you next week!
Boyin
Z!KOKO

Share this 

Share

Tweet

Forward

Copyright © 2019 Big Cabal Media, All rights reserved.
You are receiving this email because you signed up at zikoko.com

Our mailing address is:

Big Cabal Media

14 James Robertson Street, Surulere, Lagos, Nigeria

Lagos 101283

Nigeria

Add us to your address book

Want to change how you receive these emails?
You can update your preferences or unsubscribe from this list.

Email Marketing Powered by Mailchimp

You'll like this

October 28, 2019

Nigerian elections come with a lot of drama. Whew chile! View this email in your browser 28 – 01 – 2019 This is Zikoko’s Game of Votes Weekly Dispatch. We share the most important things leading up to the 2019 General Elections, and why they matter. 5pm. Every Monday. Stay woke.  IT’S 19 DAYS TO THE GENERAL […]

October 28, 2019

Here we go again. View this email in your browser 10- 10 – 2019 This is Zikoko’s Game of Votes Weekly Dispatch. We share the most important things that happen in Nigeria every week. 5pm Thursdays. Stay woke.  1. WHERE ARE OUR GIRLS? Because we are living in a country so far down the toilet, it has […]

October 28, 2019

And they’re not good. View this email in your browser 17 – 12 – 2018 This is Zikoko’s Game of Votes Weekly Dispatch. We share the most important things leading up to the 2019 General Elections, and why they matter. 5pm. Every Monday. Stay woke.  IT’S 61 DAYS TO THE GENERAL ELECTIONS And the vice-presidential candidates still […]

NerdEfiko

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

Watch

Now on Zikoko

August 7, 2020

Sufferings in mirror are closer than they appear. Approach with caution because adulthood is the ghetto. 1) Attitude towards savings: As a student: Vibes and inshallah. As an adult: Piggyvest, Cowrywise, Kolo. 2) Attitude towards spending: As a student: My money grows like grass. As an adult: There’s rice at home. 3) Source of money: […]

August 7, 2020

How well do you know the alphabets? All you have to do is type the alphabets backwards from Z – A on a single line in one minute. Only press “Enter” after you’ve finished typing all the letters of the alphabets on a single line. DO NOT press “Enter” after typing each letter. I.e Don’t […]

Recommended Quizzes

January 2, 2020

Do you have even a single romantic bone in your body? Well, if you’re not sure about just how sweet and thoughtful you can be to someone you love, that’s what this quiz is here to answer.

October 10, 2019

2019 is certainly Burna Boy’s year, but, if we are being honest, so was 2018. Since his transcendent mixtape, Outside, the afro-fusion star has refused to get his foot of our necks — dropping a string of fantastic singles and then capping it all off with his career-best album, African Giant.  So, in a bid […]

November 27, 2019

Do you have a face that could make angels jealous, or should you really be walking around with a nylon bag over your head so you don’t scare children? Well, this quiz is here to answer that by telling you exactly how good-looking you are. Take and find out:

October 29, 2019

We are going to be attempting to guess when you’ll marry based on your favourite Nigerian foods. What does your fave swallow have to do with when you’ll tie the knot? Please, don’t ask complicated questions. This quiz is rigorous and accurate (don’t quote us), so just take it already.

how tall are you
March 11, 2020

Did your parents give you enough beans when you were growing up? If they did, then you’re probably around 6’0″ and above. Either way, we created a quiz that can guess your current height (pretty accurately, if we do say so ourselves). Take to see if we nailed it:

More from Game of Votes

November 22, 2019

This is Zikoko’s Game of Votes Weekly Dispatch. We share the most important things that happen in Nigeria every week. 5pm Thursdays. Stay woke.  Beggi Beggi, E No Good O     Who knew Yahaya Bello, governor of Kogi State, was so influential? He definitely yields some kind of power over the who’s who in Nigerian politics if a whole Madame […]

November 22, 2019

This is Zikoko’s Game of Votes Weekly Dispatch. We share the most important things that happen in Nigeria every week. 5pm Thursdays. Stay woke.  Beggi Beggi, E No Good O     Who knew Yahaya Bello, governor of Kogi State, was so influential? He definitely yields some kind of power over the who’s who in Nigerian politics if a whole Madame […]

November 22, 2019

This is Zikoko’s Game of Votes Weekly Dispatch. We share the most important things that happen in Nigeria every week. 5pm Thursdays. Stay woke.  Beggi Beggi, E No Good O  Who knew Yahaya Bello, governor of Kogi State, was so influential? He definitely yields some kind of power over the who’s who in Nigerian politics if a whole Madame First […]

October 28, 2019

Nobody knows, but it’s provocative. View this email in your browser 24- 10 – 2019 This is Zikoko’s Game of Votes Weekly Dispatch. We share the most important things that happen in Nigeria every week. 5pm Thursdays. Stay woke.  WHY DID THE MINISTRY OF COMMUNICATIONS GET A FANCY NEW NAME?               […]

October 28, 2019

Here we go again. View this email in your browser 10- 10 – 2019 This is Zikoko’s Game of Votes Weekly Dispatch. We share the most important things that happen in Nigeria every week. 5pm Thursdays. Stay woke.  1. WHERE ARE OUR GIRLS? Because we are living in a country so far down the toilet, it has […]

October 28, 2019

Plus, how to be a governor in 100 days. View this email in your browser 5- 9 – 2019 This is Zikoko’s Game of Votes Weekly Dispatch. We share the most important things that happen in Nigeria every week. 5pm Thursdays. Stay woke.  1.NOBODY WINS WHEN THE FAMILY FEUDS.   In a cycle that comes around every […]

October 28, 2019

Let’s take a look at that list, part deux. View this email in your browser 1- 8 – 2019 This is Zikoko’s Game of Votes Weekly Dispatch. We share the most important things that happen in Nigeria every week. 5pm Thursdays. Stay woke.  LET’S TAKE A LOOK AT THAT LIST, PART DEUX. Ever since President Buhari submitted […]

October 28, 2019

Plus, Abba Kyari: The Way, The Truth, And The Executive Life. View this email in your browser 22- 8 – 2019 This is Zikoko’s Game of Votes Weekly Dispatch. We share the most important things that happen in Nigeria every week. 5pm Thursdays. Stay woke.  1. OF PORTFOLIOS AND MEN. Congratulations are in order for members of […]

October 28, 2019

When did ‘youth’ get a new meaning? View this email in your browser 25- 7 – 2019 This is Zikoko’s Game of Votes Weekly Dispatch. We share the most important things that happen in Nigeria every week. 5pm Thursdays. Stay woke.  LET’S TAKE A LOOK AT THAT LIST. Not like we’re counting, but two months post-inauguration, three […]

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.
March 12, 2020
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.
February 6, 2020
Who doesn't want to find love? In our bid to help, we paired up a bunch of single Nigerians, sending them on an all-expense paid date, and interviewing them before and after they met.
January 27, 2020
Nigerians Talk is what happened when a motley crew of young Nigerians were put in front of a camera and asked a bunch of apparently random questions about life, love, money and more.
September 24, 2019
A group of Zikoko staff go on a road trip to every mainland country in ECOWAS West Africa

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X