2020 has been strange, and it has been so bent on changing our lifestyles. First, it was the Lagos Okada ban situation. But they were still operational in some areas. Then the coronavirus pandemic sauntered in. Now, with a lockdown, no reasonable person is going out. It’s only been a few weeks, but it’s not too early to give in to nostalgia and remember the times when it was normal to jump on an Okada. And when a story like this can happen:
1. It’s one of those days when jumping on an okada is the best thing you can do for yourself
Not every time Uber, sometimes enjoy fresh breeze.
2. You flag the first one you see and you get yourself a ride.
Please, know the route and don’t be in a rush to meet your maker.
3. You jump the bike and say a quick prayer.
I’m in your hands now, Oh God.
4. On the way, you remember that you didn’t negotiate a price
No problem, though. Everyone knows it’s #100
5. You get to your destination after a series of events that could have ended in tears.
Me: 1. Village people: 0
6. You whip out #200 from your pocket and give it to your biker.
Take, you wannabe-murderer, and get out of here.
7. You wait for your #100 change. He fumbles through his pocket and brings out something that looks like #50.
Eiss, it’s like infected breeze had entered your brain, abi?
8. You try to be the calmest you can be and tell him the correct fare.
Please, don’t make me change it for you.
9. But he disagrees, with conviction, telling you that you’ve got it wrong.
Abi this one is mad ni
10. Every word he utters adds a new layer to the level of irritation welling up in you.
11. You’ve heard enough now. You unleash your hard guy voice that you’ve always known will come in handy one day
Oga, give me change jare
12. But also, you wonder if you can handle the guy if he becomes aggressive
Hard guy, hard guy, naso I go get concussion.
13. And if the money is worth the black eye you might get if things go sideways.
I mean, I could actually live without any of this.
14. When he finally gives you the stinkiest look you’ve ever seen, curses you, and throws your balance at you before he speeds off
One small step for you, a giant leap for mankind.
But hey, it won’t be like this forever. There are more fights to have with Okada riders. In the meantime, continue to stay safe, and if you’re feeling stressed, take a break from everything and lose yourself in some joyful content curated just for you. Find link below.
