Different Times You’d Rather Be Left Alone But Nigerians Won’t Let You

May 18, 2020

Is there anything more annoying than wanting to be left alone, planning your day around that time, but enemies deciding that’s when they want to hatch their plans against you?

We know all about it, and honestly, our condolences. If your alone time has ever been interrupted as seen in any of these scenarios, there’s a big Zikoko hug waiting for you:

Finally leaving work. Jamming the new Naira Marley, enjoying quiet time with your president, and a crazy in the next lane decides to cut you off.

Why, why, why?

When you’re heartbroken and using the darkness in your room to cover your tears and your mom remembers she needs you to buy ogi in the next compound.

         Why can’t we be left alone?

Playing FIFA and finally beating your guy 3-1 when your girlfriend walks in, asking why ‘TFC Surulere delivery’ was texting you last night.

Um.. what?

Listening to music alone, but stopping right when the bass is about to drop because your dad keeps needing remote assistance in the sitting room.

But is that fair?

After you’ve suffered alone in the kitchen, wanting to balance, eat and watch your favourite TV show, when your roommate suddenly wants to ‘hang out’

This just isn’t fair.

Waiting patiently for the office toilet to empty out when 5 women, 2 children and a big chicken walk in for a discussion.

What manner of stress?

Boyin Plumptre

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