Since time immemorial, well 1999 actually — Nigeria has celebrated its escape from pasty colonialists and military berets with a grand Democracy Day celebration. This day is usually characterised with a much needed public holiday, parades and the inauguration of successful candidates in the year’s elections.

May 29th, 2019 was no different, only it kind of was. Tuning things a little south of regularly scheduled Democracy Day programming, we couldn’t help but ask a couple of much-needed questions:

1.Wait, what were we celebrating again?

So, May 29th is no longer recognised as Democracy Day. Instead, it is now the day set aside to mark the transition into a new government. June 12th will now stand as Democracy Day, to commemorate the fairest election Nigeria ever held. But fret not, you’ll still get a break. Perhaps guilt-ridden by how hard things are in Nigeria, the federal government has set the day aside for yet another public holiday! Aren’t we the luckiest.

2. What was in Buhari’s bag?

His flight itinerary for his next two holidays, sorry official visits? The speech he didn’t give to us on May 29th? Perhaps it’s a metaphor, ‘another presidential bag secured’. Guess we’ll never know.

3. And speaking of that speech… What happened there?

Always one to switch things up, President Buhari broke a long standing tradition that sees newly sworn in presidents, address the nation on inauguration day. Why he chose to break tradition, we don’t know. Perhaps he thought this would suffice. Well, he thought wrong.

4. Any takers on what the officer had to tell Oshiomole to leave the stage?

“You sef look, do you see any other Safari suits on this line?”

“Were you not at rehearsals yesterday? Make like Beyonce and move it to the left… or right, whatever. Just go”.

5. Where was Ambode?

Conspicuously missing from Sanwo-Olu’s inauguration was no other than the outgoing governor of Lagos State, Governor Akinwunmi Ambode.  Was he taking time off to recover from the damage 4 years of waist training might have done? Was he relishing in not having to suck belle to make shirt fine? None of that it would appear, he just didn’t want to steal any of Sanwo’s spotlight with his dashing figure. How kind.

6. This was a day before, but what was the drama between Amosun and Abiodun?

ICYMI, for the handover program, Governor Amosun sent his SSG to represent him, while the incoming governor, Dapo Abiodun sent his Deputy-elect — Engineer Noimot Oyedele-Salako to receive the formal handover. What’s with the beef guys?

7. Very importantly, why was Gowon the only former head of state present at the inauguration?

If a row was set aside for former heads of states, things would have been real lonely over there. No Obasanjo, not a peep from Shonekan; the only person Pres Bubu had to share jokes about having to run Nigeria with was no other than Gowon. Where did the love go?

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