POV: Your phone just fell out of your hand. Like that one scene in ‘The Matrix’, everything freezes. You’re broke at the moment so if the phone spoils in any way, you’re screwed. In the split-second it takes your phone to hit the ground, the following thoughts race through your mind.

1) “MOGBE!”

With a sprinkle of HAY GOD!!!

2) “I JUST bought this phone with all my savings. I have nothing left!”

“Why TF did I do that?!”

3) “What if the screen breaks?? It’ll cost like 70% of the cost of the phone to fix!!”

Awon iPhone and Samsung gang.

4) “Now I have to go all the way to computer village and possibly have my wallet AND penis stolen.”

Jesus take the wheel.

5) “Will I be phoneless until I get it fixed? What will I do with myself until then??”

With nothing to distract yourself with, you’ll finally have to spend time with yourself and your thoughts.

6) “Who can I beg for money now?”

“Let me call my uncle whose name I can’t really remember and pretend I’m just calling to say hi.”

7) “Wait. What if other things spoil along with the screen?!”

“Charging port! Mouth Piece!! Ah!!!”

8) “Shebi people are owing me money?”

The time has come.

By this time, your phone has hit the floor. You pick it up. Your heart is pounding and you’re somehow already covered in a nervous sweat.

“Lord, I will dedicate my life to you if this phone doesn’t spoil.”

The screen is intact. Everything is fine. EVERYTHING IS FINE!!!

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