7 Things You Have To Look Out For Before Renting A House

July 29, 2019

You’ve done it.

You’ve endured all the horrors of house hunting and you’ve found the perfect apartment. It’s everything you’ve ever wanted. In your mind’s eye, you can already see yourself lazying around the house naked on Sunday afternoons.

Good.

Here are 7 things you need to look out for before you pay the rent, sign that lease or whatever.

1) Check the neighbourhood to see if it floods when it rains.

It’s best to check out your dream house in the rainy season because Nigerians are going to laugh at you and make memes when you’re on the roof of your building, screaming for help because mother nature vexed and decided to re-enact the plot of The Great Flood.

2) Check the house to see if it was built with cheap materials.

Light switches, sockets, door handles, etc. The last thing you want is your ceiling fan pulling a Final Destination by falling out of the ceiling and decapitating you.

Because that would suck for you and whoever has to clean up the mess.

3) Speak to the neighbours to get a sense of what electricity is like in the area.

Because Nigeria.

Lest you walk into the land of eternal darkness, eyes wide open.

4) Find out all you can from the landlord (and neighbours) about the people who lived in the apartment before you.

Just to get what kind of energy they left behind. What were they like? Were they fun and outgoing or did they keep to themselves? Did they frequently throw loud parties that ended in orgies or did they enjoy a quiet night in with some candles, a good book (of spells) and a pentagram drawn with blood? Did they move out of their own accord or were they brutally murdered by an unseen force in the living room? Did they…

5) Find out if there’s an ancient burial ground beneath the building or anywhere around.

Did you see what happened to the families in Poltergeist and Pet Sematary? It’s best to do your research before you end up in your own Stephen King supernatural horror thriller. The only good thing that could come of that is if you survive and get a book/movie deal.

You know what? Forget what I said. Stay. Stay so you can get that book/movie deal.

6) Pour salt on anyone you come across in the area to fish out the ghosts and demons.

I knew my wealth of pop culture knowledge would come in handy one day. That being said, I don’t know if this is just a thing the writers came up with for the show. It can’t hurt to try sha. (It can.)

7) Make sure the neighbours aren’t members of a devil-worshipping cult looking for a suitable host to physically bring the antichrist into the world.

Don’t give me that look. We’ve all seen Rosemary’s Baby. And The Omen. And Devil’s Advocate. And the…

If you need more advice about house hunting and moving out from your parents’ house, we made a video about in the first season of our show, Nigerians Talk, in which the cast shared all they’d learned about the process. Check it out below to learn valuable life lessons to live by.

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

You'll like this

How to survive on 15k in a month
March 25, 2021

I saw this tweet and it had me, a resident broke person, thinking. There’s no foolproof method on how to survive on ₦15,000 a month but I wrote this guide last month. This one is for those of you that didn’t read it. 1. Plan your budget Budget which family member you are cutting off […]

Watch

Now on Zikoko

Recommended Quizzes

November 4, 2019

After successfully predicting when y’all are getting married (please, email any complaints to noneofourbusiness@nayousabi.com), we are back to tell you how much is currently in your account. How, you might ask? By using your taste in Nollywood, of course. Shhh. No questions. Just take it already:

What are you like in a relationship?
February 7, 2020

Your taste in music can say a lot about you, and this time, it’s going to reveal what you are like in a relationship. So, pick a few of your favourite Nigerian love songs, and we’ll let you know if you’re typically a distant, passionate or unbothered partner. Here you go:

June 14, 2020

Have you ever been with someone so horrible that you swore to never date again? Yes? Well, do you know that one or more of your exes probably feels the same way about you? You never thought about that, huh? Thankfully, this quiz is here to let you know just how much of a hassle […]

how much of an ajebutter
February 12, 2020

Are you an ajebutter or not? Well, if you’ve gone through life blissfully unaware of its harshness, then you probably are. Now, we want to know just how high you rank on that ajebutter scale, using your food preferences as a (very accurate) measure. Take to find out:

More from Inside Life

May 20, 2022

Nobody will pass off a chance to win an all-expense-paid trip to KENYA with the winner of Nigerian Idol Season 7. So if you are still thinking, dreaming, waiting, or thinking you have enough time, then you are wasting time because this promo is ending on the 7th of June. Do we have your attention? Here’s […]

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

December 14, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
November 2, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
October 26, 2020
A collection of videos documenting some of the events of the EndSARS protests.
June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.
March 12, 2020
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X