Are you tired of your basic 9-5 and thinking of a career change? Well, here is how to be a prostitute in Nigeria
1) Wear an Anklet
This singular piece of jewelry has basically cemented your place as a certified prostitute
2) Drive a car
Obviously the only reason you are driving a car is because you are a prostitute. Who cares if your actual job is being a driver. Woman driving car = prostitute. It is quick math.
3) Wear “revealing” clothes
What determines if a cloth is revealing? We do not know, but once anyone thinks you are showing too much skin, “ASHEWO!” So what if it is just your ankle that is visible? It is too much.
4) Go out alone
Only prostitutes hangout alone. That is a fact that has been proven by our favourite Nollywood movies. The only reason you are out is to prey on young defenseless men. Shame on you.
5) Use contraceptives
“Na only ashewo wey no wan born pikin”
6) Tattoos
Any responsible member of society will not tarnish their image by having such. You are using it to advertise market and state your availability
7) Use expensive things
Honestly, how dare you be able to afford things for yourself? Definitely man that is buying it for you. Continue, we are watching
8) Be a woman
Breathe wrong, and someone is shoving that word down your throat. Who gave you the audacity to live your life the way you want to? Ashewo!