In the world of creatives, there is such a thing as artistic license, where artists bend the rules of fact, grammar or language to produce artistic results.
Over in Nigeria however, we take things several notches ahead, bending the rules until they break, burst into flames and disintegrate, perfectly ensuring they make no sense whatsoever to the audience intended.
From the nation that bore and housed a man that wondrously found a way to rhyme ‘yam pottage’ with ‘oil spillage’. Together with the lady who I’m assuming was within the 5 minute daily madness limit, when she wrote a song that mentioned Johnny about a thousand times in one verse; here are 8 other song lyrics we’re still looking to the Lord to offer explanation:
- Take Banana – D’Prince
Whenever I am having a particularly bad day, I like to sit and imagine the process that brought this song to be. Did D’Prince put pen to paper, writing out Take Banana 489 times? Did he simply write ‘Take banana X 592’? Perhaps he was in the booth, had a bad case of whatever Davido had here … and then proceeded to mumble Take Banana in comfort?
We’ll probably never know. But that won’t stop us from demanding an explanation regardless.
2. Every Eedris Abdulkareem song from the 2000s
How Eedris Abdulkareem got audiences to sing along to his lyrics in the early aughts is a thesis topic worth exploring and you know it!
Defying the laws of grammar, tact and common sense, Eedris did whatever the hell he pleased when it came to putting pen to paper to call up song lyrics.
What is a rhyme scheme or puns, when you can simply gargle and spit the outcome in a booth somewhere?
That said, most of the songs went hard and were Nigerian favourites for the longest times. Are Nigerians our own worst enemies?
3. Give it to me – D’prince
We love a repeat offender.
4. In My bed- Wizkid
FIrst off, I’m a little worried at Wizkid’s choice of words in this song. Why does he want ‘her body’ sleeping in his bed? Why can’t he be like his wealthy counterpart and stick to ‘Alive girls’?
That said, I’m utterly miffed Wizkid went through all that trouble to announce how much he really wants a maybe corpse in his bed, before having a complete change of heart to hail Fashola, himself and Jimi Agbaje? Is everything okay at home Wizkid? Is your pet baby goat still okay?
5. The Truth – Vector
Giving a lifetime supply of ammo to Mode 9 in this diss song, Vector thought it’d be a good idea to pen the words ‘like three broke in Yoruba, I metaphor’.
Finding understanding to these lines might be a job too big for the Nigerian police, so I will be calling upon the Lord for clarity.
6. Iyanya – Kukere
If something is giving me a headache, everyone else must suffer through it as wel. Sorry not sorry.
As the source of my pain, here is a screen shot of the first few verses of Iyanya’s banger – Kukere. I’ll let you ponder on this for the rest of the day
7. Masterkraft – Indomie ft Davido, CDQ and Olamide
I can’t with my full chest drag this song because of my antics in the club when it first dropped, but man oh man, was a lot going on in this.
Personally, I would very much appreciate Davido to give a nuanced explanation for the following lyrics if he can:
“All the girls know me oo
I get cash money oo
Oya ligali oo
Baby girl are you legal o
You make me spiritual o
But I wan touch you physical o”
Just a simple request, plis dear.