Nigerian Politics is the gift that just keeps giving. Just when you thought Dino Melaye had proved himself worthy of his skits and questionable dress sense, Aisha Jummai Al-Hassan, known to most as Mama Taraba, showed up this week to serve us with real petty goals.
For those who don’t know her, Mrs Alhassan first came to the spotlight when she lost the race to be governor of Taraba State to Darius Ishiaku of the PDP. For her troubles, she was made Minister of Women Affairs in 2015. Here’s where it gets interesting.
This year. The APC screened her out of the race for the governorship ticket. So our mother in pettiness left the party. Fair enough right? Except on Thursday, her ‘boys’ showed up at the APC secretariat to relieve them of all the things she had donated to the party.
She packed it all, people of God. From computers and office furniture to rugs and air conditioners.
If I move, my property moves – Mama Taraba
Imagine it. One minute, you’re sitting in your new office, the next, someone asks you to stand up because the owner wants to collect her chair and table back.
Hate it or love it, Mama Taraba has set a new standard in showing people you’re actually in charge. Which reminds of us of a few circumstances where we’ve seen these before.
These are the classes of Nigerian politicians Mama Taraba reminds us of.
Those people who want to see how low you can go because they’re already lower.
One day, Dino Melaye will release a full mixtape with Vic-O as his campaign material, just so you know it’s real.
Those people who are sure you can’t create as much trouble as them
Fayose is what pettiness would be if it came from Ekiti, enjoyed frying akara with market women and had ambitions to become a DJ and President at the same damn time.
The class of politicians who will do anything to see their dreams come true
Some of these people have changed parties more times than we’ve eaten in the last three days. But who’s counting right?
Then there are the godfathers that will promote their nephew to firstborn because the first son is misbehaving.
Flogging a bad child, according to Jagaban.
Those people who will bring out your black file the moment you stop being friends
You can go from being the saviour of the world to being a complete nuisance in two days.
Did we leave anyone out? If there are other petty icons, let us know in the comments.
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