They say you can’t miss what you never had. (Un) Fortunately for us single pringles, while everyone is collectively worrying about issues like oil prices, practising safe social distancing and lockdown etiquette, we’re excused from worrying about another matter. One of the heart — being apart from your significant other while the coronavirus is contained. […]

Brymo — “Strippers + White Lines” Brymo, one of Nigeria’s most acclaimed singer-songwriters, just released his seventh studio album, Yellow, and “Strippers + White Lines” is its astounding lead single. On the Mikkyme Joses-produced track, Brymo sings about his struggles with depression, his unhealthy coping mechanisms and fighting to find the light amidst all the […]

Yoruba people are the kings of parties. Undisputed. They are the kind of people who will throw a party to celebrate the success of a previous party. And they ALWAYS go all out. Always. Aso ebi in place, excess food; most times, they even hire a live band. This list will show you a list […]

We know the rona is currently standing in the way of many, many travel plans this year of our lord 2020; but if your name is Fatoki Omotoke and you started a mission to go round Nigeria, with its relative virus safety in 2019, you wouldn’t let that stop you. So when she completed her […]

Aunty brought 3 new Love Guests to the house, I believe for Chris, Sylvia, and Jerry. Sylvia and Jerry wasted no time in approaching and getting to know the new guests, but Chris? I give up!

At this point, Aunty might need to legalize boyfriend/girlfriend snatching, since they’ve refused to swap. We need more drama infused into this show.

You know that our prophecies never fail. All through Valentine’s Day, our prophets were on the mountain, praying for divine revelation. Now they have brought it back. Are you ready for this tea? 1. A lot of true identities will be discovered. “Dear Gloria. I never knew you were a harlot, but thankful to know […]

Do you want a fashion trend to blow up? Bring it to Nigeria. Do you want a fashion trend to suffer? Bring it to Nigeria. Here’s a list of fashion items Nigerians have worn to death. 1. Lemon green Balenciaga and the accompanying shorts. The whole of Balenciaga has suffered in the hands of Nigerians, […]

Are you ‘Melo Melo’ or ‘Science Student’?

Valentine’s day is coming. But rather than ask where your boy/girlfriend is or how lonely you’ll be, we’re going to remind you of simpler times. When Valentine’s day was less roses and chocolates and more another day in February or a casual slump in your monthly allowance. Here’s how Valentine’s day has transitioned for Nigerians […]

In case you have not realised it, Nigerians have a PhD in lying. Multiple PhDs, even. And there are some people who are professors in the art of lying, but we will keep that conversation for another day. Anyway, here is a list of common lies Nigerians tell. Don’t lie, we know you must told […]

Anyone who grew up in a Nigerian household understands that the Saturday routine does not change. It is the same yesterday, today and forever. If you are a true Nigerian, then you’ll understand these pictures and their connection to Saturday mornings. 1. Morning devotion by 6:00 AM. In which your parents can slap you for […]

“Congratulations, you got the job.” comes with its own brand of anxiety. That’s when imposter syndrome from your village people comes out to visit, asking questions like: “can you perform? how long before they discover that you are a fraud?” There are also other problems more work-related with a new 9-5, especially in Nigeria. So, […]

There are very few things as triggering for women as the topic of hair. Whether its weaves, weave length, wigs, the great frontal V closure debate; there’s always something to talk about. Now if extensions are topic enough to get women riled up about hair, wait till you get to the topic of the very […]

In no particular order, the top three feelings in the world are: Receiving credit alerts Having a test cancelled that you didn’t prepare for Staying home the whole weekend after cancelling plans with the 7 friends and two family members you swore you’d hang out with. Now money in undefeated and that test thing is […]

I know it’s only been 36 days, but man. Nigeria is going through it this 2020. From bans to a level of insecurity that makes you want to tape your eyes open at night; here are some of the worst things about living in Nigeria in 2020 so far: Insecurity. Nigeria’s insecurity is spiking at […]

Nudity or being half-naked is greatly frowned upon. Well, unless under certain circumstances and events. This just goes to show that almost all of life is contextual so don’t tight everything to your chest. So, when is it acceptable to be half-naked in public? Let’s begin: 1) Buying jeans at Yaba market: I repeat: Yaba […]

Food is life, we agree. But do you know that while you’ve been playing it safe with food, some people are out there engaging in culinary BDSM? We know you don’t, and that’s why we brought you this to help you move your meal time from basic to advanced. Below is a list of weird […]

1) Author: Mark Manson. No lies detected. 2) Author: Chinua Achebe. “Things fall apart, the danfo cannot hold.” 3) Author: Fyodor Dostoevsky. Crime: Being a Lagosian. Punishment: Being a Lagosian. 4) Author: John Green. “Being stoic means preparing for the worst but in Nigeria (read as Lagos), the worst always happens.” 5) Author: Agatha Christie. […]

Gather round, there’s enough room in today’s free okada-ban therapy session for everybody. As we all know, the Lagos State government has decided the motto for 2020 is ‘pepper-dem’, but not in the good way. The state has instituted a ban on okadas and keke-napeps from the plying major roads. The ban came into effect […]

As many of you know and as some of you can attest through the sweat that soaked through your baffs on the way to work, the Lagos State government has banned bikes/Okadas and Napeps/tricycles from plying major roads in the state. Now it might not feel like it, but bike men/keke napeps drivers should feel […]

Instagram vendors are now everywhere, thanks to the internet and to the founder of Instagram. You can be in your house and buy a complete outfit, down to eyelashes that will match the outfit. And we are grateful, honestly. But Instagram vendors need to stop these things, because we are tired. 1. Asking us to […]

Preparing for the IELTS exam should count as part of the risk factors for hypertension in Nigeria. People are actively trying to leave the country but the English test seems to be a major obstacle in their path. We present some of the super real moments for people who have had to take this exam: […]