1. So your phone’s network has vanished.
What kind of nonsense is this?!
2. At first you wonder if it’s your phone that has the problem and you get the urge to start slapping it.
The official Nigerian solution for faulty electronics.
3. Then you remember that you might break the screen by mistake and you calm down so the devil won’t use you.
There’s no money to repair screen in this recession.
4. You realize your mother was right when she said you were addicted to the internet.
But you won’t admit it to her because if you do, you’ll never hear the last of it.
5. So you decide to entertain yourself with your networkless phone to try and prove her wrong.
Where there’s a will, there’s a way.
6. You find yourself playing the 3D version of Bounce that for some reason, came with your Tecno phone.
So Tecno just stole this game from Nokia like that? Nawa oh
7. And you wonder how you even enjoyed this game back then because you’re already bored.
We didn’t have good taste back then sha.
8. You remember that you haven’t played Candy Crush since one difficult level made you quit so you go back and try that.
Ah, Candy Crush. We meet again.
9. 80 tries later, you still haven’t passed the level. Your frustration intensifies.
10. You violently swear for your service provider for putting you in this position.
YOU PEOPLE THAT WORK THERE WILL NEVER KNOW HAPPINESS!!!
11. You decide to re-watch all the funny videos on your phone.
I guess it’s back to Alfa Sule…..again.
12. The videos aren’t as funny as they once were but you force yourself to laugh because you’re trying to fight the overwhelming boredom.
You’re clearly losing the battle but you keep fighting cause mama didn’t raise no quitter!
13. You pause the current video playing to wonder why you didn’t listen when people told you port to another service provider.
Had I known!
14. You start going through your picture gallery and come across a good selfie you took. This makes you smile.
See as I fine. I AM A SLAY QUEEN/KING!!!
15. You realize that the only reason you didn’t port when you had the chance was because your current service provider sells cheap data.
Awoof dey run belle. Lol
16. You decide to take this time to go through your contact list and delete people you know you’ll never call.
Olusanya Balogun. This one that I hated. DELETE!
17. Next, you start taking selfies. Boredom is slowly turning you into Bobrisky.
18. As there’s no internet to distract you, you decide to do the dishes.
Every disappointment is a blessing in disguise.
19. You also decide to cook a proper meal for yourself. Not every time noodles.
See what I can accomplish when i’m not wasting my time with the internet!
20. You quietly promise yourself that when your subscription expires you’re porting to another network.
Enough is enough.
21. Suddenly, a message comes through. NETWORK IS BACK! All is forgotten.
After all, God said we shouldn’t make decisions when angry.