1. When the conductor refuses to stop for you because it’s not the “bus stop”:

They’ll just be shouting, “No be bus stop be dis”.

2. All the hatred you feel when the conductor is busy enjoying breeze outside and you’re sweating like Christmas goat inside:

3. All those perverted conductors:

Can you please keep your hands to yourself?

4. When you nearly miss your bus stop because you can’t even understand what the conductor is saying:

Which language do they even speak please?

5. Never ever EVER ask a conductor for directions:

They’ll just help you loss.

6. When you can’t find your money and you’ve already been giving the conductor eye:

It’s not a joking sturvz.

7. When you forget to collect your change from the conductor:

It can pain.

8. Conductors always manage to “forget” giving you change:

Conductors are the real scum tbh.

9. That annoying thing conductor’s do when they join your change with another passenger’s own:

Like, really?

10. When the conductor leaves with your change, it can really pain:

Like, really.

11. Really, when the conductor does not give you change, it can pain:

It’s not even funny at all.

12. When you’re trying to form ajebo to call your bus stop, conductor will just be looking at you like:

What is this one saying?

13. If you want to collect your change, you have to switch language for these conductors:

You cannot be forming ajebo for Lagos conductor.

14. You can really never be too sure when it comes to conductors and change:

Especially when there’s no money on these here streets.

15. When you’re staying jejely in your lane and the conductor uses his own to jam you:

But why na? Is it fair? Ehn?

16. When you want to do strong head after the conductor has said he doesn’t have change:

You get mind sha.

17. That awkward moment when the conductor starts fighting on top of your head:

Sha don’t punch me please.

18. Waiting for the conductor to give you change like:

Oya o…

19. When the conductor is trying to do strong head and doesn’t want to give you your change:

I go show craze for here today.

20. When the conductor is acting like they sent him to you:

If na play you dey play just stopeet.

21. When you decide to unlook and give the conductor bad money:

Eez like you don’t even like yourself.

22. All those conductors that like running away with change:

Where you dey go?

23. And all those conductors that’ll be abusing somebody anyhow because of change:

If you like abuse, just sha give me my change.

24. You when the conductor asks for money again after you’ve already paid:

It’s like something is worrying you.

25. When the conductor starts telling you to “dress, dress”:

Dress yourself.

More Zikoko!

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